As some of you may know, I've been pretty busy for a while now. And, well... it's starting to really get to me. For over 6 whole months it's been one thing after another. School, holiday traveling and expenses, drama, hospital trips, moving, cleaning, work, more school, and just about every other little thing that could have popped up to slow me down pretty much has. So it only figures that as soon as I start to getting g really close to catching up, and dare I say, getting ahead... travesty replaces the casual inconvenience that I've grown accustomed to. I'll spare the horrible details, but once again the lose of a loved one takes its toll upon my family and me. I hurt, not solely for the of some one that I really did enjoy having around, but for the more damaging effect that it's had on one person who was closest to them. It's just getting to be so damn hard. I'm becoming ever so hard to just keep on truck like I have for so long. And the more I think about and share it with some of my friends and family... it seems like its hurting more, and digging up old pain with it.

But nothing is stopping, I want a break but really don't see one in site. I'm so used to the bombardment of shit thrown my way and carrying the weight of others that I don't know how else to look at things.

Nothing can really be done at this point. I'm just being selfish. The people I'm helping g need my help, so I can't just stop. Some things just need me there to be done and helped with... but as a selfish plea, as stupid and pitiful as it sounds... just even a few kind words would be appreciated.

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Update: Thank you for all of your support, kind words, and encouragement.

Today we held the funeral service. Not an easy time, but we're grateful that laying him to rest did help grant us some closure to this whole horrible event. We will all miss him, as he was a wonderful, vibrant, kind, and loving person. I would divulge more information, but I don't believe it is my place to do so in such a public manor.

Otherwise, I feel a good deal better. I talked with some of my family members, one of my closest friends, and of course Yuni. Just talking with them really did help out a lot of lightening up the load that was on my shoulders.

Of course things are going to start having to go back to a normal pace... and by that I mean me falling behind due to missing pretty much all week from school dealing with the whole tragedy and supporting and just being there for my family. Again, just knowing that I have even a few friends here who can share some kindness with me is enough to make me smile again.

Thank you all so much.