*sits down, tired, dirty, grimy, weary and physically exhausted beyond death then begins to type*

friends, I write to you today to tell of a fucking epic tale still in the works. the story goes a little something like this, as told from my personal P.O.V. while duking it out on the front lines:

One month and three days ago, I undertook a great task onto my shoulders. this task was helping my very recent girlfriend  jenryu Jenryu out with cleaning up the huge mess that was left by her room mates after they picked up and left for greener pastures in quite a hurry, much like rats from a sinking ship or bandits running from the law while getting the fuck out of Dodge city. They currently reside in Texas, and honestly even though I am officially pissed off to all hell at them I wish them all the best in getting their lives together and loose ends tied up. They probably don't realize how much strife they caused, but hey, all I have to say is this: they provided the fire to anneal my metal, and I was re forged into a stronger individual because of it. for that, I must thank them.

in any case, getting back on track, they left just before the beginning of May, taking with them their bare essentials and bad company (I'm referring to the house guests who didn't help one bit aside from on the last day: all they did was screw, eat the food we brought over and smoke outside while we tried to get our gear in order.) and leaving us with a mountain of strife known as Jenryu's Horde of woes. through much muscle strain, tireless hours spent after exhausting both of ourselves to past the breaking point, endless levels of frustration and a few sessions of nearly having mental lapses, we pushed on. She with working from ten AM to Seven PM as a cake decorator for King Soopers (which by the by, is more physically exhausting then one might think) and then walking an hour long walk back to the apartment, and I who woke up around ten-ish AM every morning to physically box and clean the lonely and desolate two bedroom- one bath apartment to the best of my not so domestic ability. Hours of work turned to days, and days turned to weeks of toil, and what brief moments of relaxation we both had on her dwindling days off were met by an onslaught of hell the next day where the vicious cycle started anew.

it was at one point deep within our labors that we realized that we were only two individuals against a legion of odds. desperately we stood our ground, but we realized that we would lose the battle if we did not have any assistance. We tried calling for re enforcements, asking politely to all we could think of- friend and family alike. Only a few brave souls could be rallied against such an epic force, and this is the point of the story where their valor must be sung about. Most notable of all there were our individual parents, who's seasoned guidance and wisdom lent us a helping hand, but there were also seven dear friends who chose to pick up the proverbial sword and shield to help out in our cause.

Our good friend  Nighteyes_5 Nighteyes was kind enough to come over for a few hours to help out with the epic fight, with polearm of plucky common sense in hand and dagger of sardonic wit gnashed between his mighty giraffe jaws, he skillfully decimated the first wave of boxing and staging the titanic toatables and then sallied forth back to his residence with relative ease, much like a youjimbo samurai into the sunset at the end of an Akira Kurosawa movie.

The second wave was met with a dynamic Duo, a tag team with the skill and accuman that of seven seasoned professionals.  Zuci Zuci and Klandahgi Silentclaw charged forth into battle against the daunting second wave, with only sharpies, box cutters and packing tape to back up their formidable prowess of mind, body and iron clad will. Zuci set forth with lightning speed, tackling the sheer volume of killer knick-nacks and trecherous trinkets with prowess one could only find in a natural huntress. her husband, Klandahgi, calculated and tackled the inconceivable odds like a scholarly tactician of a warrior that he is, racing hither and yon to supply Zuci's battle on the front lines with adequate accoutrement such as boxes, cleaning supplies and additional packing materials. together, they stood upon the mound of boxes and toat tubs like the epic level 80 W.O.W. PvPers atop a hill of pixelated bodies surveying their handiwork. after their epic decimation with the second wave, we sat and supped upon the great beast of stuffed crust cheese and pepperoni, and their was much rejoicing and merriment.

the third and final wave was dealt a devastating blow by a surprise pincer attack from a quintet of combatants, Ryan, Ben, Mike and Ron. while I and Jenryu had finished up our respective runs to the storage facility, these four fellows of epic and win swooped in like the precision sweeper team that they are and cleared out the most heaviest hitters. Ryan and Ben tackled the duo known as the TV stand and the remaining dresser, while Ron and Mike tackled the deadly over sized temper-pedic bed and box spring. afterwords each of them joined forces to load the back of jenryu's mother's car and in record time, this fearsome foursome of spec ops. gamers had dwindled the ranks of Jenryu's clutter down to an easy three easy truckloads. afterwords, they went as unexpectedly as they came, slipping silently into the night like true net ninjas.

from there, the grueling task of unloading and loading the remainder of Jenryu's horde into storage came with various tribulations and expected levels of muscle fatigue, not to mention injury and strife. in the end though, here Jenryu and I stand atop the first victory we have had in quite some time. both our metals were tested and truly we came out of these current situations stronger individuals then when it began in the first place. however, a great cloud looms over our horizons. we have about a week of recuperation before the second major battle begins: moving Jenryu's horde into a new apartment once she acquires it.

hopefully this next fight will be more fruitful then the previous, and we will have more numbers on our side to aid in the battle yet to come.

this is Sarcosis, signing off for now.