So I have a girlfriend.

It's not a secret--I make sure to make it plain that I'm in a long-term, committed relationship with someone. That someone is *UTTERLY COOL* with what I do on the Internet--namely, her reaction to me mentioning a manbitch of mine was, and I quote: "Would they make a good table? Or footrest? Girl's gotta put her feet up sometimes, y'know. And they'd have to wear an apron." And she's cool with the love I SHARE with those people--the people who help define me, who play with me, who I support and who support me, who I try to reassure that life is going to get better for.

I just don't talk about her.

I don't talk about her because, frankly, our relationship is a nice, even one; because she has her right to privacy, and because I don't want her to find this place on' th googlenets. I put a lot of my more personal thoughts here sometimes, and while I don't really consider them secret--if they were I wouldn't post them--it'd be an embarrassing deal. It's got its problems--some of which I find this place helps me deal with; I won't lie, but overall, I'm not going to stop loving her.

But that also won't get in my way.

I reserve the right to like people. I reserve the right to care about people. She wouldn't love me nearly as much, I suspect, if I didn't have a powerful and driving urge to help people lower their guard, to help them relax, and to keep them happy--and sometimes that makes my friends uncomfortable.

Uncomfortable or not, I love, and am loved. I care, though I am not always cared for.

And I will never, ever give that up.