So, I pride myself on my cooking. I've been told it is epic. I've had violence threatened when I forgot my home-made BBQ sauce. Seriously, violence. A lynching even. I have a tuna salad recipe I do that is gormet, and last night, it failed horribly.

I thought I had done something wrong, but I could not figure out what it was. I did everything right - I used real tuna steaks, grilled in a sauce made of lemon juice, paprika, dill, garlic salt and pepper. I mixed that tuna with paper-thin slices of celery, two chopped boiled eggs, chopped green onions, mayo, a touch of mustard, salt and a bit of lemon juice. Usually I add some chopped granny smith apple, but I forgot to get some last night. I put it on lightly toasted bread with nice loose leaf lettuce and thin sliced raw zucchini.

It. Was. Horrible.

This morning, I attempted a PBJ on the same lightly toasted bread and could hardly choke it down. Then I had a closer look at the bread in question. If you can't make a good PBJ, there's something wrong with the bread.

I thought I had purchased a nice multi-grain brown bread.

I had bought a no-grain flax-soy bread.

NEVER AGAIN. EVER.

It should be illegal to sell cardboard in the shape of a loaf of bread, as bread. Seriously, this stuff tastes like cardboard boxes smell.