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Oklacon report, SATURDAY
15 years ago
So, after waking up from the most epic dream of me being on a team of ninjas taking out big ass robots with lightsabers, I wake up, get dressed, and tale my laptop over to the artists alley to work on some music. Crys and Rinzi are in there, along with Derrick and a few other furs who I hadn't met yet. I finally got up the inspiration to finish a piece titled "Science Class" for my Time EP, which is honoring my favorite teacher who pushed me to my limites and encouraged me to enroll in a program called Upward Bound, which eventually led to my college graduation.
I pretty much stayed in there until it was announced that it was time for Predator and Prey, which I'd been pretty pumped for all day.
--
Now, remember how I said I didn't wanna do anything embarassing? Yeah. Keep reading.
So right before that, I went to the turkey roost, and they happened to have leftovers from the sponsor lunch, some absolutely stunning beef wellington with potatoes and salad and some freaking awesome peach cobbler a la mode. My inner fat kid was like, "OMG SO FUCKIN FANTASTIC OMNOMNOM" and as soon as I took my last bite, Predator and Prey was announced.
So, I'm standing in line, waiting to pick my beads, and my dumbass picked herbivore.
FUCK ME.
I was trying to map out some sort of strategy, picking out who the carnivores were, who looked the fastest and who i thought I could outrun. I got my paper and pencil, and we got released, and I head toward the grassy areas behind the artists alley. It's about this time I realized I still had by bright blue shirt and pacman hoodie on, making it pretty hard to hide.
DOUBLE FUCK ME.
So, I'm out in this damn field trying to blend in with Inky and Sue standing out like an alligator in traffic, and the moment I find my first water, the omnivores are released. So I change up my strategy and try to find other herbivores to hang out with, because if they get eaten, I'm all good!
I find a few, and here come the omnis, ready to eat my ass. (theres a joke in there harharhar.) My strategy works pretty good, I outrun the other herbivores and they get eaten, and I live another day. This happens again, I run again, and once again I get away. I found a food on top of a hill, which is being patrolled by two other omnivores, who start counting. I realize by now I've lost my pen and my paper. They're already on 14 to 30.
TRIPLE FUCK GOD DAMNIT.
So I try to stall by looking for my pencil and paper, which fails horribly, so I take a leap of faith and volley myself down the side of a hill, which actually works without resulting in my death, in game or otherwise. I avoid one more carnivore with a juke move and make it to the safe zone.
By now I'm pretty spent and theres like an hour and thirty minutes left in the game, but I'm really really competitive, so I'm like WHATEVER HO I AINT SCURRED WHERE MY WATER AT, Idrink a few of those and take off down toward the bathrooms to talk to Wind.
He says there is food behind one of the far a frames so I jog over there, and I get hit by the truck. Damnit, 7 lives left. I dont even get to put my ring back on my pants when a carnovire comes FLYING around the corner after me. I start sprinting in the other direction and fucking Tobias comes from around the tree who is flood. So by now I'm like, yeah I'm about to be raped by water and a damn wolf, so I take my changes with Tobias, and lo and behold he ingores me and kills the carnivore! Woot!
However, by now I'm so tired I cant run from the omnivore who patiently watched me tire myself out. 6 lives left.
By this time the carnivore is back alive, and the flood is gone, so he starts chasing me again, I sprint towards the safe zone, and I get saved by the truck, who hits him this time instead of me.
By now, I'm stupid tired, my legs are shaking and my heart is going 340 bpm. I realized in my haste I lost some of my beads because I didnt clip it well, so I have only 3 left. FFFFFFuck.
I overhear a herbivore say there was lots of food and water in the parking lot, so I head that way, and I find said supplies. I also find an omnivore who is waiting in ambush, so once again, I start running. Normally I could have easily outpaced him, but I'm so exhausted, so I run behind a car, and we do the whole car chase thing. I'm just hoping that flood or fire or disease or SOMETHING would come out of the woodworks, but nooooo, it was just him and I, running around a car for a good 10 minutes. I finally make a break for it and run my fastest and barely manage to get away from him and stumble into the safe zone.
Now. By now, I cant stand, I'm so tired, and I feel it coming on. Eating a full meal with barely any water before all that running was a baaaaaaaad idea. My sights getting all hazy and my stomach is doing gymnastics getting 10s all over the place, but I was fighting it every moment, because I'll be damned if I'm the one fur at con that is remembered for barfing his guts out in front of everyone at the Turkey Roost.
Well, all the willpower in the world wont save you from upchucking so I discovered. I managed to signal to someone that I needed a trash can because I couldnt stand up, and he had good timing because right after that, I prayed to that plastic trash can god. All the beef welling ton, all the peach cobbler, EVERYTHING cane right back up in quite the unflattering and disgusting manner.
I was pretty mortified, but I was amused by the fact that I did not get caught by any carnivores. I decided that I died of natural causes in that game of Predator and Prey, and security told me that I cant leave until I rested for a good hour and drank and kept down atleast four glasses of water, which I had no problem with agreeing with.
After that I went back to my tent and rested for a bit, then I hung out over at Don's tent and talked about music (Reminder for myself to look up Moog Machine) and I drew myself barfing into a trash can to commemorate my embarassing moment.
I hung out there for a while, and then headed up to watch the Variety Show, which was actually pretty damn entertaining. I especially enjoyed the Furrank Sinatra song, since I'm a HUGE jazz buff, and I was amused by watching them impromptu dance in fursuits.
Night game of Predator and Prey started about this time, but I was like "screw that I'm not playing this anymore!" and headed back down to Don's tent and watched the chaos, mainly at Corsi cursing up a storm because he had to play with a bracelet made of bells, broadcasting his location to everyone.
After unsuccessfully trying to talk Don into going to the dance (I fail at flirting REALLY BAD) I head up there, but like BARELY anyone was there, so I wasnt really feeling it that much. Danced for a bit, hung out for the rest of the night at the campfire where I met Dizz who does a hell of a Chef impression (He saw me and was like, OMG THERE ARE OTHER BLACK FURS OTHER THAN BUCKTOWN AND ME!) went back to the tent and passed out for another great night of sleep. (no ninja dreams this time.)
I pretty much stayed in there until it was announced that it was time for Predator and Prey, which I'd been pretty pumped for all day.
--
Now, remember how I said I didn't wanna do anything embarassing? Yeah. Keep reading.
So right before that, I went to the turkey roost, and they happened to have leftovers from the sponsor lunch, some absolutely stunning beef wellington with potatoes and salad and some freaking awesome peach cobbler a la mode. My inner fat kid was like, "OMG SO FUCKIN FANTASTIC OMNOMNOM" and as soon as I took my last bite, Predator and Prey was announced.
So, I'm standing in line, waiting to pick my beads, and my dumbass picked herbivore.
FUCK ME.
I was trying to map out some sort of strategy, picking out who the carnivores were, who looked the fastest and who i thought I could outrun. I got my paper and pencil, and we got released, and I head toward the grassy areas behind the artists alley. It's about this time I realized I still had by bright blue shirt and pacman hoodie on, making it pretty hard to hide.
DOUBLE FUCK ME.
So, I'm out in this damn field trying to blend in with Inky and Sue standing out like an alligator in traffic, and the moment I find my first water, the omnivores are released. So I change up my strategy and try to find other herbivores to hang out with, because if they get eaten, I'm all good!
I find a few, and here come the omnis, ready to eat my ass. (theres a joke in there harharhar.) My strategy works pretty good, I outrun the other herbivores and they get eaten, and I live another day. This happens again, I run again, and once again I get away. I found a food on top of a hill, which is being patrolled by two other omnivores, who start counting. I realize by now I've lost my pen and my paper. They're already on 14 to 30.
TRIPLE FUCK GOD DAMNIT.
So I try to stall by looking for my pencil and paper, which fails horribly, so I take a leap of faith and volley myself down the side of a hill, which actually works without resulting in my death, in game or otherwise. I avoid one more carnivore with a juke move and make it to the safe zone.
By now I'm pretty spent and theres like an hour and thirty minutes left in the game, but I'm really really competitive, so I'm like WHATEVER HO I AINT SCURRED WHERE MY WATER AT, Idrink a few of those and take off down toward the bathrooms to talk to Wind.
He says there is food behind one of the far a frames so I jog over there, and I get hit by the truck. Damnit, 7 lives left. I dont even get to put my ring back on my pants when a carnovire comes FLYING around the corner after me. I start sprinting in the other direction and fucking Tobias comes from around the tree who is flood. So by now I'm like, yeah I'm about to be raped by water and a damn wolf, so I take my changes with Tobias, and lo and behold he ingores me and kills the carnivore! Woot!
However, by now I'm so tired I cant run from the omnivore who patiently watched me tire myself out. 6 lives left.
By this time the carnivore is back alive, and the flood is gone, so he starts chasing me again, I sprint towards the safe zone, and I get saved by the truck, who hits him this time instead of me.
By now, I'm stupid tired, my legs are shaking and my heart is going 340 bpm. I realized in my haste I lost some of my beads because I didnt clip it well, so I have only 3 left. FFFFFFuck.
I overhear a herbivore say there was lots of food and water in the parking lot, so I head that way, and I find said supplies. I also find an omnivore who is waiting in ambush, so once again, I start running. Normally I could have easily outpaced him, but I'm so exhausted, so I run behind a car, and we do the whole car chase thing. I'm just hoping that flood or fire or disease or SOMETHING would come out of the woodworks, but nooooo, it was just him and I, running around a car for a good 10 minutes. I finally make a break for it and run my fastest and barely manage to get away from him and stumble into the safe zone.
Now. By now, I cant stand, I'm so tired, and I feel it coming on. Eating a full meal with barely any water before all that running was a baaaaaaaad idea. My sights getting all hazy and my stomach is doing gymnastics getting 10s all over the place, but I was fighting it every moment, because I'll be damned if I'm the one fur at con that is remembered for barfing his guts out in front of everyone at the Turkey Roost.
Well, all the willpower in the world wont save you from upchucking so I discovered. I managed to signal to someone that I needed a trash can because I couldnt stand up, and he had good timing because right after that, I prayed to that plastic trash can god. All the beef welling ton, all the peach cobbler, EVERYTHING cane right back up in quite the unflattering and disgusting manner.
I was pretty mortified, but I was amused by the fact that I did not get caught by any carnivores. I decided that I died of natural causes in that game of Predator and Prey, and security told me that I cant leave until I rested for a good hour and drank and kept down atleast four glasses of water, which I had no problem with agreeing with.
After that I went back to my tent and rested for a bit, then I hung out over at Don's tent and talked about music (Reminder for myself to look up Moog Machine) and I drew myself barfing into a trash can to commemorate my embarassing moment.
I hung out there for a while, and then headed up to watch the Variety Show, which was actually pretty damn entertaining. I especially enjoyed the Furrank Sinatra song, since I'm a HUGE jazz buff, and I was amused by watching them impromptu dance in fursuits.
Night game of Predator and Prey started about this time, but I was like "screw that I'm not playing this anymore!" and headed back down to Don's tent and watched the chaos, mainly at Corsi cursing up a storm because he had to play with a bracelet made of bells, broadcasting his location to everyone.
After unsuccessfully trying to talk Don into going to the dance (I fail at flirting REALLY BAD) I head up there, but like BARELY anyone was there, so I wasnt really feeling it that much. Danced for a bit, hung out for the rest of the night at the campfire where I met Dizz who does a hell of a Chef impression (He saw me and was like, OMG THERE ARE OTHER BLACK FURS OTHER THAN BUCKTOWN AND ME!) went back to the tent and passed out for another great night of sleep. (no ninja dreams this time.)
