I've had similar feelings before. You do amazing art, I hope that you can get back to where you really enjoy it again and can see and appreciate your own growth in your works.

I'm trying to get back into it, and maybe somewhere along the way I'll succeed and create more of what I used to really enjoy.

I might be a stranger, but you do have great art. I hope you would find those drawing feelings again.

Muses are funny things, and are likened to the wind element for a reason. They dance in fickle ways, leaving and returning on a whim. Without an immediate passion for an art, creating becomes a tedious chore. When that chore is something you once loved doing, it can be almost painfully frustrating. Like trying to wring blood from a stone. That ever-mocking blank page preventing you from making every little stroke on the medium. Constantly trying to force creativity when you feel burned out only seems to make the blockage bigger and more frustrating, doesn't it? I always feel it is more important to enjoy the art first, and to be able to work it well second; for fear of turning a great joy into just another blank routine.

Don't beat yourself up over this. Few people can simply pierce a creativity block. The fact you have acknowledged your situation and are taking steps to make sure everything is fine with everyone is one simple but vital thing that many artists never even bother to do. The fairest thing is to simply be straightforward, and you have done that. As this slowly resolves, the only thing you have to do is wait for your muse to blow back in, and it will, as awkwardly impatient as it can leave you, the spark always returns eventually.

Stay chill <3

*Many hugs in this difficult time*

I think you need to stop being so hard on yourself. Fear is the mindkiller and all that. Evaluate what's got you all worked up.

I'd take a breather, re-fresh, make a list of what you need to do. Then dole that out in manageble deadlines. Write down what you need to do for each day, and cross things off at the end of it. Take it as a victory when you get half of that list done. Yes, that includes doing household chores and eating breakfast. Appreciate and acknowledge your accomplishment of the small things, that will help you mentally. Then you can take the smaller/easier of the commissions and get one done. Once you get a victory in, it gives you teh strength and confidence to keep going. Don't forget : scheduling you time is just as important as the rest of the world time.

I know your life has been hard as of late, but you pull through. I have faith in you. It's the crunch from getting back up slowly that's the hard part.