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Let's be honest for a second (giant dicks)
14 years ago
I just wanted to say something here.
I'm sure it's been around for a while now but I never really took notice of it before. I don't know if it's just trending more these days or what but I've noticed what is to me an influx of disproportionately huge cocks. If you're into that, all the more power to you. I'm not here to judge. I'm just sayin'. That shit freaks me the fuck out.
First off, anyone with a cock that huge must not get laid often enough. You can't really stick it in someone else's mouth and if you manage to shove that up someone's ass you're liable to kill them. Of course considering the amount of porn I've seen on here depicting furries that are as tall as said cocks, miraculously taking one up their hoo-hole down to the hilt, perhaps I'm just mistaken on the logistics of the whole thing. All I know is, if I can't comfortably fit my lips around it, or it is too close to being as wide as, or wider than, my own wrist it ain't comin anywhere near me. As a predominantly topping personality I have certain ass-pects and ass-ets to protect. Let's face it. Bowling balls were not meant to effortlessly squeeze through toilet paper rolls, and neither were these arrows meant to spilt you in twain. Sorry buddy, but your stuck with your left and right lovers if you're propositioning me.
Secondly, you have to take into consideration where someone so 'well endowed' hides their tree trunk when they're off the job. Sure. Most of these dicks are sheath-able, but in physiological terms, I'm sure this would require a separate 3X colon sized compartment in a place where we're busy storing other important innards; like your bladder, your colon, several major arteries, and of course the glands important to sex. When you require a convertible's hard top compartment in your belly to fold up your anaconda, it doesn't leave much room for anything else. And also, think about the guys that can't sheath their one-eyed monster. It doesn't matter what kind of pants you wear, you can't disguise it. Even being a grower over a shower has no benefit. You either have an enormous tumor where your dick should be or the worst case of unintentional indecent exposure ever. No matter how you look at it you're boned. But then again, maybe no boning occurs. (see what I did there?)
Lastly, I just wanted to point out that with a stiffy like that, you've gotta have lower back problems. It doesn't sound like much but roughly 4+ pounds of weight extending from that area of your body has to do some damage, in one form or another.
I don't have much else to say on the subject, but seriously. Come at me with one of those and I may mistake it for an attack on my life.
I'm sure it's been around for a while now but I never really took notice of it before. I don't know if it's just trending more these days or what but I've noticed what is to me an influx of disproportionately huge cocks. If you're into that, all the more power to you. I'm not here to judge. I'm just sayin'. That shit freaks me the fuck out.
First off, anyone with a cock that huge must not get laid often enough. You can't really stick it in someone else's mouth and if you manage to shove that up someone's ass you're liable to kill them. Of course considering the amount of porn I've seen on here depicting furries that are as tall as said cocks, miraculously taking one up their hoo-hole down to the hilt, perhaps I'm just mistaken on the logistics of the whole thing. All I know is, if I can't comfortably fit my lips around it, or it is too close to being as wide as, or wider than, my own wrist it ain't comin anywhere near me. As a predominantly topping personality I have certain ass-pects and ass-ets to protect. Let's face it. Bowling balls were not meant to effortlessly squeeze through toilet paper rolls, and neither were these arrows meant to spilt you in twain. Sorry buddy, but your stuck with your left and right lovers if you're propositioning me.
Secondly, you have to take into consideration where someone so 'well endowed' hides their tree trunk when they're off the job. Sure. Most of these dicks are sheath-able, but in physiological terms, I'm sure this would require a separate 3X colon sized compartment in a place where we're busy storing other important innards; like your bladder, your colon, several major arteries, and of course the glands important to sex. When you require a convertible's hard top compartment in your belly to fold up your anaconda, it doesn't leave much room for anything else. And also, think about the guys that can't sheath their one-eyed monster. It doesn't matter what kind of pants you wear, you can't disguise it. Even being a grower over a shower has no benefit. You either have an enormous tumor where your dick should be or the worst case of unintentional indecent exposure ever. No matter how you look at it you're boned. But then again, maybe no boning occurs. (see what I did there?)
Lastly, I just wanted to point out that with a stiffy like that, you've gotta have lower back problems. It doesn't sound like much but roughly 4+ pounds of weight extending from that area of your body has to do some damage, in one form or another.
I don't have much else to say on the subject, but seriously. Come at me with one of those and I may mistake it for an attack on my life.
O_O
o_o
._.
owww...
Don't come near me.
O_O
o_o
._.
owww...
Don't come near me.
When you put it that way, yes I see your point. All I have to say to this though is the MST3K Mantra, or Bellisario's Maxim, whichever you prefer. Yes, this is completely unrealistic, and if it were real all the problems you mentioned would be very real too. But this is about fantasy, not reality. Which means a) when nothing else can explain all those problems you mentioned, magic will do and b) those of us who like hyper know very well it's a fantasy and could not be real, and that's the point.
So...you're right, and of course no one asks you to like or look at this stuff. But to each their own, and if you're going to point out the impossibility of hyper, you might as well as say that about everything here since furries are also impossible. It's all in fun, don't worry. :)
It's not something I'm in to, but I mean no disrespect, nor attempt to dissuade those that are. I'm just expressing how I feel about it for the sake of comedy. And of course I realize it's fantasy. As I've said to many, as a furry, I feel I have no room to speak when saying that something or someone else is weird. We kinda take the cake...
That being said, to those that are unique, that have unique interests, etc. I wish to empower. I support self expression and in no way wish to stand in it's way. So if you like hyper (which I didn't know that that's what it was called until just now lol) great! I'm not trying to be mean or anything like that. Have fun! That's what it's all about!
But since you just found it amusing, and wanted to comment on the phenomenon, then no worries. :)
And yes, hah, hyper is the term for it, from the prefix. Above, beyond, super, excessive. ;)
Yay for us weird furries! Let us unite in our weirdness, even as we have different kinds of weirdness.