Heyo, Spike's doing this one.

You are placed, through involuntary means, in an environment that's completely new to you. You're unprepared and no one's helping. There isn't even a tour guide. What to do?
Ain't that just how it goes? I mean, this may sound cynical for someone in my position, but nobody ever helps. Just keep movin' forward and don't be afraid to raise your fists.

You've recently developed a crush on someone and it's strong, as in you have an urge to openly express your feelings. How do you approach this dilemma?

Don't pussyfoot around it, man. Just DO it. That's how I roped Lyla in. You just need to grow the pair you're entitled. Women don't like you putzing around the subject like a whiny neutered animal.

Your rival, who may or may not be your arch enemy as well, has just beat you in a competition, in front of everyone. What's your initial reaction?
Death before dishonor. I'd get up and keep fighting til either I won or died trying.

Someone who you previously thought of as a reliable friend has just betrayed you. Response?

Good GOD, are we still in high school? To me, turning on a friend is grounds for the most savage beatdown of their lives.

When asked what you think of the term "bravery" you answer...

Bravery is leaving no ass unkicked, y'know? If you feel that something is wrong or immoral, by God, you change that.

You have been asked to attend a very fancy occasion, like a dinner party or masquerade ball for those of rich status. Upon receiving the invitation you...
No thanks. Class I can fake, but I'd feel really out of place somewhere where I couldn't be me, per se. Basically, anywhere where I can't blare Hard Rock and crack open some PBRs.


You've found a wallet with a considerable amount of cash inside it. It has vague information on who the original owner was and no one's around to see you pick it up. What do you do?
If I'm scavenging, I may keep as much cash as I need, but under any other circumstances, they'd get back all of their money. Being a Guardian Angel grants me some pretty great tracking abilities and technology.

Someone you don't know very well has come up and desperately asked to use one of your possessions for a bit, promising to be careful. What do you think?
Really, what could you have taken from me that I haven't already lost? The only things I have left are my .44 Magnum and the shirt on my back, and you definitely aren't taking my gun from me.


What, overall, is your greatest fear? (Think this one over.)
This question would be so much better had I not lived out my greatest fear already. Losing Lyla was something I'd been fearing for years.

What do you want more of?
Another beer right now wouldn't be too bad.

In all honesty though, I could use more of a sense of belonging than I have now.

Media and the press and a swarm of screaming fans has found you! Reaction?
Well, I'd probably sign some autographs or share some stories with fans, but not until I'd incapacitated that camera crew.


What do you think of getting married and possibly raising a family?
That was my dream. In all honesty, even a macho guy like me wants that. Lyla would've made the best mother of anyone I know.

A renowned seer who's successfully told the future before has foretold your death. It will happen in one week. Uh oh...what do you do?
Uh, a bit late to the draw there, dontcha think?