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oh Onion. you are genius!
14 years ago
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Bill Watterson Writes, Illustrates, Shreds New 'Calvin And Hobbes' Strip Each Morning Out Of Spite
August 29, 2011 | ISSUE 47•35
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CLEVELAND HEIGHTS, OH—Despite not having published a new comic strip since December 1995, cartoonist Bill Watterson has reportedly taken the time every day since to write, pencil, hand-ink, and, out of spite, destroy a new installment of Calvin And Hobbes. "Wow, this might be one of the best yet," Watterson said as he completed his 5,689th strip of the past 16 years and then immediately fed it into a paper shredder. "I bet my millions of fans would really love this whole new direction for Spaceman Spiff. Oh, well, fuck them." According to sources, Watterson also spends a portion of his time calling comic strip syndicates to discuss publishing new material, only to abruptly announce, "Actually, that's never gonna happen," and hang up the phone.
the funny part is I almost believe its true.
August 29, 2011 | ISSUE 47•35
Article Tools
CLEVELAND HEIGHTS, OH—Despite not having published a new comic strip since December 1995, cartoonist Bill Watterson has reportedly taken the time every day since to write, pencil, hand-ink, and, out of spite, destroy a new installment of Calvin And Hobbes. "Wow, this might be one of the best yet," Watterson said as he completed his 5,689th strip of the past 16 years and then immediately fed it into a paper shredder. "I bet my millions of fans would really love this whole new direction for Spaceman Spiff. Oh, well, fuck them." According to sources, Watterson also spends a portion of his time calling comic strip syndicates to discuss publishing new material, only to abruptly announce, "Actually, that's never gonna happen," and hang up the phone.
the funny part is I almost believe its true.
Weird thing is, I have a friend named Bill Watterson, and that ain't him!
And at our high school reunion back when C&H was going great, he was this close to putting down his occupation as "cartoonist"
I'd show a cardboard box with the word transmogrifier written on it, a pair of hands are coming in off panel opening it up.
Inside you see a lot of old toys, and comic books now the hands are holding a stuffed tiger one paw as a split seem with stuffing leaking out and it's missing an eye
Next you are looking down on the stuffed tiger his paw is fixed and the hands hold a needle and thread as it sews a new eye into place.
Next you's see the hands lowering the plush tiger into a crib with a toddler. "Its a rough world out there kiddo. Not everyone is going to be nice, and it's not always going to be easy."
Next you'd see the owner of the hands, adult Calvin leaning over the child "But a friend can make it all a little easier. Knowing that I found the best friend I could think of. "
It would end showing the toddler again with the Tiger form of Hobbes cuddling up to the kid with yawn. In the background you can see papa Calvin slipping out into the hall "He always took great care of me, and from experience I know every kid could really use a tiger now and then."
the Focus is on charlie brown but shows up later in the story
http://www.whatisdeepfried.com/2008.....eapon-brown-1/
not safe fork work due to occasional nudity and graphic violence