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Eventful....
14 years ago
Today was...
Had to deal with a lot of drama this morning. Thanks to my ability to over react when I'm half asleep and feeling attacked, I probably lost a friend who was already pretty annoyed with me.
I just hate it when people don't ask if I want to help and just do it and then expect me to be grateful for their forced help.
I also can't stand it when people tell me what to do. It probably has to do with the fact that my mom raised me very loosely... she knew my sister needed more supervision, what she didn't understand was that I needed structure too.
And lastly, I hate how selfish everyone is. You are not the most important in the world. You should not be thinking of yourself first. You should think of yourself, I'm not saying you shouldn't. I'm saying you should make sure that what is good for you isn't bad for someone else. Even if you don't realize it, you could easily step on someone else's feelings. And when you make the mistake, you need to feel remorse, you DO NOT have the right to step on someone else, EVER. Make it up to them, apologize and pray that next time you will think before you act.
It's going to take a LOT to make up for how I treated my friend today. It's going to take even more to make those slow steps back to friendship and even more to show them that I don't want to freak out again, at them or anyone.
I've hit rock bottom. That's why I'm here. To heal, for all to see, but no one to judge.
In other news, I've posted my first piece of "art". It's a crappy doodle done with Sai and an old, second hand, broken Wacom. Once I get a job I will be investing in a new pen and then a new Wacom all together. In the meantime, I'm sorry. XD
<3 StarDust
Had to deal with a lot of drama this morning. Thanks to my ability to over react when I'm half asleep and feeling attacked, I probably lost a friend who was already pretty annoyed with me.
I just hate it when people don't ask if I want to help and just do it and then expect me to be grateful for their forced help.
I also can't stand it when people tell me what to do. It probably has to do with the fact that my mom raised me very loosely... she knew my sister needed more supervision, what she didn't understand was that I needed structure too.
And lastly, I hate how selfish everyone is. You are not the most important in the world. You should not be thinking of yourself first. You should think of yourself, I'm not saying you shouldn't. I'm saying you should make sure that what is good for you isn't bad for someone else. Even if you don't realize it, you could easily step on someone else's feelings. And when you make the mistake, you need to feel remorse, you DO NOT have the right to step on someone else, EVER. Make it up to them, apologize and pray that next time you will think before you act.
It's going to take a LOT to make up for how I treated my friend today. It's going to take even more to make those slow steps back to friendship and even more to show them that I don't want to freak out again, at them or anyone.
I've hit rock bottom. That's why I'm here. To heal, for all to see, but no one to judge.
In other news, I've posted my first piece of "art". It's a crappy doodle done with Sai and an old, second hand, broken Wacom. Once I get a job I will be investing in a new pen and then a new Wacom all together. In the meantime, I'm sorry. XD
<3 StarDust
