The Great (not quite) Canadian Adventure!
14 years ago
So, today was eventful. As some may know, I held a movie marathon Saturday night in my dorm building down in Seattle. It was sweet, each movie being even more WTF than the last. We got to bed WAY too late, and woke up way to early. x.x
Anyway. Even
koohiimonsutaa came down from Canada to party, though we had to drive Koohii back today. That's were it got fun.
forceuser was behind the wheel of the great Wagon, with Koohii up front, me in the back, and my roommate Melody next to me. Now, me and Melody don't have passports, but we figure, hey, we'll just get up to the truck border crossing, and Koohii can get out and walk across to be picked up on the other side.
We bebop our way north (Classic Rock on the Radio, heck YES), past Everett and Ferndale and all those great places. The wait at the border is super long, so we're all laughing about how we won't have to sit in Traffic. Then we look up at the line of cars in front of us and realize we can see the Peace Arch. OH. CRUD.
There isn't anyway to turn around when you cross at the Peach Arch, you're pretty much forced to go across the border into Canada. Which spells pretty bad news for me and Melody. We freak out in the car for about ten minutes, then wave over a border worker to ask him frantically how we can turn around. (WE'RE DUMB AMERICANS. WE DON'T WANT TO GO ACROSS THE BORDER. WE GOT LOOOOOST D:) He tells us there's a turnaround up ahead we can use before the customs booths.
We take it, of course, then realize that the turnaround is on the other side of the American customs booths. Everyone knows that the problem isn't getting into Canada, the problem is getting back out through the American Customs booths. Which we now have to go through.
OH CRUD.
We get up the booth, deciding we're going to play it like stupid Americans. (which we are. . . except Koohii.) Give the man at the booth our IDs ( a passport, an Enhanced Canadian ID, a New Mexico ID from Melody, and a Washington State Driver's License from me. Yeah, guess which one's aren't accepted at the border.)
We frantically explain to the booth man that we got lost, that we didn't even go to Canada, and we just need to drop off our Canadian freind. We're directed down to the little border crossing building so they can check our stories. Cue the standing in line, freaking out about being EXILED FROM AMERICA FOREVER. Being a government office, that gets to go on for half an hour.
Of course, we get up to the guy behind the counter, tell him that we never went to Canada, he takes our IDs and is all "I'll have you guys out of here in 5 minutes." We about cry and kiss his feet. Seriously.
We get out of customs (thank god) and get turned around heading to the truck crossing where we can actually pull over at the border grocery store and turn around before encountering CANADA. We pull over, look around, realize we have no idea how to turn around. There's three lanes of COMPLETELY stopped traffic between us and the southbound lanes (not to mention a concrete wall) and Canada is only a couple yards away.
That, and we have to pee.
Leo goes to get directions (us dumb Americans again), whilst the rest of us check out the terrible gas-station bathroom out back. The girl's bathroom is typically devoid of toilet paper is both dingy stalls, and out of paper towels at the sinks. I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS. So I go over to the men's bathroom. (I'm Androgyneous, so who cares which bathroom I use?) The stall there is well stocked, with two spare rolls sitting on top of the toilet. There's even an extra roll of Paper Towels next to the sink.
I bring them back into the girl's bathroom and BECOME THE BATHROOM HERO.
. . . then we dropped off Koohii headed back south back to Seattle. The end.
So, TL;DR, my International Crime Spree has come to an end. They caught me at the border. Fun fun on a Sunday night.
Anyway. Even
koohiimonsutaa came down from Canada to party, though we had to drive Koohii back today. That's were it got fun.
forceuser was behind the wheel of the great Wagon, with Koohii up front, me in the back, and my roommate Melody next to me. Now, me and Melody don't have passports, but we figure, hey, we'll just get up to the truck border crossing, and Koohii can get out and walk across to be picked up on the other side. We bebop our way north (Classic Rock on the Radio, heck YES), past Everett and Ferndale and all those great places. The wait at the border is super long, so we're all laughing about how we won't have to sit in Traffic. Then we look up at the line of cars in front of us and realize we can see the Peace Arch. OH. CRUD.
There isn't anyway to turn around when you cross at the Peach Arch, you're pretty much forced to go across the border into Canada. Which spells pretty bad news for me and Melody. We freak out in the car for about ten minutes, then wave over a border worker to ask him frantically how we can turn around. (WE'RE DUMB AMERICANS. WE DON'T WANT TO GO ACROSS THE BORDER. WE GOT LOOOOOST D:) He tells us there's a turnaround up ahead we can use before the customs booths.
We take it, of course, then realize that the turnaround is on the other side of the American customs booths. Everyone knows that the problem isn't getting into Canada, the problem is getting back out through the American Customs booths. Which we now have to go through.
OH CRUD.
We get up the booth, deciding we're going to play it like stupid Americans. (which we are. . . except Koohii.) Give the man at the booth our IDs ( a passport, an Enhanced Canadian ID, a New Mexico ID from Melody, and a Washington State Driver's License from me. Yeah, guess which one's aren't accepted at the border.)
We frantically explain to the booth man that we got lost, that we didn't even go to Canada, and we just need to drop off our Canadian freind. We're directed down to the little border crossing building so they can check our stories. Cue the standing in line, freaking out about being EXILED FROM AMERICA FOREVER. Being a government office, that gets to go on for half an hour.
Of course, we get up to the guy behind the counter, tell him that we never went to Canada, he takes our IDs and is all "I'll have you guys out of here in 5 minutes." We about cry and kiss his feet. Seriously.
We get out of customs (thank god) and get turned around heading to the truck crossing where we can actually pull over at the border grocery store and turn around before encountering CANADA. We pull over, look around, realize we have no idea how to turn around. There's three lanes of COMPLETELY stopped traffic between us and the southbound lanes (not to mention a concrete wall) and Canada is only a couple yards away.
That, and we have to pee.
Leo goes to get directions (us dumb Americans again), whilst the rest of us check out the terrible gas-station bathroom out back. The girl's bathroom is typically devoid of toilet paper is both dingy stalls, and out of paper towels at the sinks. I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS. So I go over to the men's bathroom. (I'm Androgyneous, so who cares which bathroom I use?) The stall there is well stocked, with two spare rolls sitting on top of the toilet. There's even an extra roll of Paper Towels next to the sink.
I bring them back into the girl's bathroom and BECOME THE BATHROOM HERO.
. . . then we dropped off Koohii headed back south back to Seattle. The end.
So, TL;DR, my International Crime Spree has come to an end. They caught me at the border. Fun fun on a Sunday night.
FA+

I love you guys.
That was so much fun :D
ONE DOES NOT SIMPLY WALK INTO CANADA.
ONE DOES NOT SIMPLY WALK INTO AMERICA
I'd probably try and mention high class drugs or something about hiding bodies...to start with. >=3
Tough break, but looks like you all had a (frantic) blast anyways!