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Halloween = Y U NO EXIST HERE
14 years ago
Good morning my friends, and let us welcome what is simply to be known as the "3 AM" version of myself. The type of me that is struck with insomnia, and suppressed rage at the world. This time, "InsomniAyla" is bringing you a little bit of rambling about why I love - and hate - this particular day.
The upsides of Halloween... Ah, the one time when the furry community is able to stuff their face with chocolate delights, and stock up on energy drinks to survive the zombies... Oh, and we can't forget the cheesy horror movies. Gingerdead Man, Killer Condom... Death Bed...
Oh but the best of all, we can get away with fursuiting in public!
...this is apparently not the case for a certain Aussie feline.
You see, Australia is a crappy place in the sense we follow a mostly British culture. Save for the "American" language (yes, most of my generation does say "pants" instead of "trousers", and yes we do know what family guy is). But we seem to be missing out on one big thing: Halloween.
The little kids sometimes get it, but over the years I've found that no-one really does anything. And with me living in this small, coastal farming town... there's really not that many people to trick or treat anyway. No-one does anything for the day. No pumpkins, no costumes, no scary pranks... just a fucking Simpsons re-run or some stupid family movie on the weekend that we've all seen millions of times. Dad's just playing L4D2 like he normally does every other night, and mum's complaining that sugar is the equivalent of cyanide.
...no seriously, my mother is banning me from eating chocolate.
She says I'm not looking after my kidneys or something... too much sugar, which is the biggest load of bull I've heard from her in a while. I only get to stuff myself with caffein and sugar about once every... two and a half months. If I drink an iced coffee, she complains. Fair enough. If I buy four cans of Monster to help study for exams (which she also over dramatizes), she goes batshit. I wanted to eat some sweets, and she wouldn't let me have more than two pissy little gum balls.
I feel starved. As a semi-vegetarian who doesn't eat red meat, I'm not getting much out of fruit and vegetables for snacks all the time. I mean, fuck. I don't even get much more than one sour mandarin because we're "broke" or some shit. Here I am starving to death because I want to eat something more than coleslaw, and the one night I should be allowed that? I have my diet constantly being controlled by my mother, like I'm supposed to go to the naughty corner if I so much as glance at a single skittle.
Now, back on the topic of costumes.
I can't go and do anything extravagant. One, no-one is holding any parties and if they are, they're the bunch of dumbasses from school who are going to do nothing but drink and cheat on each other's boyfriends, while wearing playboy bunny outfits. No werewolves. No grim reaper. Nothing interesting.
Second, this neighbourhood is dead at night. No Halloween pun intended. It's just... dead. If I knocked on the door here, i'm either stabbed by a drunk guy or giving an eighty year old a heart attack... or wake up the horse-doberman-thing down the street and annoy everyone.
So I'm going to dress as human rainbow dash and sit in my room re watching the Halloween episode... over and over again... until my brain numbs from the lack of sugar or people to trick-or-treat with. Or more likely, sit around in class trying to stay awake... not likely though as it's about 4 AM and I need to be up at 7, for my controlling mother to yell at me once more...
Time to attempt some sleep. Wish me luck.
The upsides of Halloween... Ah, the one time when the furry community is able to stuff their face with chocolate delights, and stock up on energy drinks to survive the zombies... Oh, and we can't forget the cheesy horror movies. Gingerdead Man, Killer Condom... Death Bed...
Oh but the best of all, we can get away with fursuiting in public!
...this is apparently not the case for a certain Aussie feline.
You see, Australia is a crappy place in the sense we follow a mostly British culture. Save for the "American" language (yes, most of my generation does say "pants" instead of "trousers", and yes we do know what family guy is). But we seem to be missing out on one big thing: Halloween.
The little kids sometimes get it, but over the years I've found that no-one really does anything. And with me living in this small, coastal farming town... there's really not that many people to trick or treat anyway. No-one does anything for the day. No pumpkins, no costumes, no scary pranks... just a fucking Simpsons re-run or some stupid family movie on the weekend that we've all seen millions of times. Dad's just playing L4D2 like he normally does every other night, and mum's complaining that sugar is the equivalent of cyanide.
...no seriously, my mother is banning me from eating chocolate.
She says I'm not looking after my kidneys or something... too much sugar, which is the biggest load of bull I've heard from her in a while. I only get to stuff myself with caffein and sugar about once every... two and a half months. If I drink an iced coffee, she complains. Fair enough. If I buy four cans of Monster to help study for exams (which she also over dramatizes), she goes batshit. I wanted to eat some sweets, and she wouldn't let me have more than two pissy little gum balls.
I feel starved. As a semi-vegetarian who doesn't eat red meat, I'm not getting much out of fruit and vegetables for snacks all the time. I mean, fuck. I don't even get much more than one sour mandarin because we're "broke" or some shit. Here I am starving to death because I want to eat something more than coleslaw, and the one night I should be allowed that? I have my diet constantly being controlled by my mother, like I'm supposed to go to the naughty corner if I so much as glance at a single skittle.
Now, back on the topic of costumes.
I can't go and do anything extravagant. One, no-one is holding any parties and if they are, they're the bunch of dumbasses from school who are going to do nothing but drink and cheat on each other's boyfriends, while wearing playboy bunny outfits. No werewolves. No grim reaper. Nothing interesting.
Second, this neighbourhood is dead at night. No Halloween pun intended. It's just... dead. If I knocked on the door here, i'm either stabbed by a drunk guy or giving an eighty year old a heart attack... or wake up the horse-doberman-thing down the street and annoy everyone.
So I'm going to dress as human rainbow dash and sit in my room re watching the Halloween episode... over and over again... until my brain numbs from the lack of sugar or people to trick-or-treat with. Or more likely, sit around in class trying to stay awake... not likely though as it's about 4 AM and I need to be up at 7, for my controlling mother to yell at me once more...
Time to attempt some sleep. Wish me luck.
