my panic attacks hurt someone i love dearly tonight. i'm done. idk what to do. i feel like the lowest of low right now. i'd leave this online world forever, never to return, but i know very well that i have no life outside of here and don't have the strength to leave. :/ guess i just gotta put up with my self-hate and try to control my attacks (HAHA TOTALLY NOT HAPPENING!) goddess, i hate myself...