Warning. Depressing stuff!

Blah. I've been feeling really down lately. For no particular reason either. I'll just think of something while i'm at work or at home or in jazz, and it'll start to upset me. Unless i have something to distract myself with, i'll think on it too much and become depressed or upset. Like, as far as work goes, it always seems like things go more smoothly either when i'm not there, or when someone else in in charge. Like something goes wrong on MY shift all the time and it's MY fault. I never feel like i'm good enough there. always like I'm doing something wrong, or not as well as i should.

And I've been feeling rather lonely lately, with everyone either having other things to do, other people to hang out with, or them just not wanting to hang out with me. I feel like i bug everyone i talk to because i'm always trying to set up some type of thing to hang with peeps and enjoy their company. it's so stupid for me that when i DO get the chance to be with other furiends, I feel like it's because they're humoring me, or to get me to leave them alone...This isn't so much as me wanting to be popular or anything, I guess i just kinda wanna be noticed a little. I never feel like there's anything special about me, and therefore think that because i have nothing special going on with me, no one wants me around or with them.
Actually, I'm gonna just stop cus the amount of people reading this is probably very low, or nonexistant. Night all, I think I'm gonna go try to write a poem to make myself feel better