did i really believed that i was special to him again?
that he probably loves me but is afraid to say it?
or that something would change
that because he says he loves my smile or that he hates seeing me sad, or that he likes me something will change?

no, im just a friend more for him, jus someone he can kiss and love for a night and then leave the next morning without saying a word of love spoken.
Am i really that stupid to see his messages on his forgotten phone and see a lovely goodbye probably from his girlfriend

im really stupid
nothing will change
why would i believe that something would change?

But... im still in love with him