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I need to do more music
13 years ago
Yes, I know... I really -do- need to get back to writing more music. Well, technically I need to get back to recording it... I've got a lot of stuff written up and more-or-less ready to go. I just rarely get the privacy or the time to do any recording, anymore. Looking into a possible move this fall, which could provide the potential for easier recording in a new setting. We'll see about that. Regardless, I'm still slowly putting the albums together... I use the plural because my friend and I technically have 4 that we're planning to work on. But again, without getting anything recorded, it's a bit hard to see any progress beyond creation stages.
I also need to get back at it due to my constant up-down emotional state. I usually try to be pretty nonchalant on a day-to-day basis. There's no use in being too excited about things, but also no point in being too sad, so far as I'm concerned. But every couple of weeks or so, it seems like I forget the latter point, and I tank into a bit of depression. It usually lasts for a few days at most, and then I'm back on the level again. Generally I find it stems from a sort of loneliness... or an unwanted feeling. I have a select few friends I talk to, anymore... it seems like I'm really no good to most others. At best I get a month or two of communication with new friends/contacts; if they last beyond that, it's a sign of something good. But most don't... most seem to get bored with me, I guess, after that first month or two, and move on to bigger/better things/people. So then I'm left sitting around wondering what exactly makes me so useless in their eyes, and why other individuals are subsequently more interesting. Over the years I've built up quite a list of people who I would've loved to get to know better in time, who simply vanished. If I could burn that mental list, it would be fantastic. But I can't....
I apologize for the rambling, this is all very BAWW, mostly because I'm in one of those down moods. The point of all of this is that, when I'm feeling this way, one thing that at least helps me to vent it (apart from writing things like this, which I usually do in private, for myself, so as not to bother any of YOU with it) is through my songs. The music and the words help me to channel that feeling away, even if just a little bit... the only downside being that anytime I then hear/read said songs down the line, I'm instantly reminded of the circumstances surrounding their creation, and that hardly helps me feel any better. *Snickerwoofs*
Regardless, sorry to take up all of your time. I don't expect asspats, I just wanted to make it known why I haven't submitted much, and that I'm still alive. Most of you probably a) didn't read this journal at all, or b) opened it, saw all of the text, and decided "TL;DR". For those latter people, here:
TL;DR - Writing music helps me vent my emotions, and since I'm feeling emotional, I need to write more music. Sorry I haven't uploaded much.
Until next time, everyone! Woof! ^^
I also need to get back at it due to my constant up-down emotional state. I usually try to be pretty nonchalant on a day-to-day basis. There's no use in being too excited about things, but also no point in being too sad, so far as I'm concerned. But every couple of weeks or so, it seems like I forget the latter point, and I tank into a bit of depression. It usually lasts for a few days at most, and then I'm back on the level again. Generally I find it stems from a sort of loneliness... or an unwanted feeling. I have a select few friends I talk to, anymore... it seems like I'm really no good to most others. At best I get a month or two of communication with new friends/contacts; if they last beyond that, it's a sign of something good. But most don't... most seem to get bored with me, I guess, after that first month or two, and move on to bigger/better things/people. So then I'm left sitting around wondering what exactly makes me so useless in their eyes, and why other individuals are subsequently more interesting. Over the years I've built up quite a list of people who I would've loved to get to know better in time, who simply vanished. If I could burn that mental list, it would be fantastic. But I can't....
I apologize for the rambling, this is all very BAWW, mostly because I'm in one of those down moods. The point of all of this is that, when I'm feeling this way, one thing that at least helps me to vent it (apart from writing things like this, which I usually do in private, for myself, so as not to bother any of YOU with it) is through my songs. The music and the words help me to channel that feeling away, even if just a little bit... the only downside being that anytime I then hear/read said songs down the line, I'm instantly reminded of the circumstances surrounding their creation, and that hardly helps me feel any better. *Snickerwoofs*
Regardless, sorry to take up all of your time. I don't expect asspats, I just wanted to make it known why I haven't submitted much, and that I'm still alive. Most of you probably a) didn't read this journal at all, or b) opened it, saw all of the text, and decided "TL;DR". For those latter people, here:
TL;DR - Writing music helps me vent my emotions, and since I'm feeling emotional, I need to write more music. Sorry I haven't uploaded much.
Until next time, everyone! Woof! ^^
Sorry I haven't been around much. I'll try to be on communicator more, though I'm not really one to talk much,
to anyone.
I hear what you say about feeling lonely. I get that too. I don't tend to get depressed, but I do have
some overpowering boredom from time to time.
Today I'm feeling ok. I enjoy work because it gives me something to do besides sitting around the home
all day.
Take care. *huggles*
...however, you gotta do what works best for you. (As sometimes, possibly a lot of times, you're capab;e of sorting out the problem on your own...maybe anyway, BUT, enough musing)