When you're feeding a rat, let go when she grabs the food. Don't hold on and play tug-of-war with her. You will lose. Or rather, your fingers will lose, and her teeth will win.

Rabbits do not like having their feet tickled.

Those cute grunting noises your bunny makes? They are the last warning you get before she tears your hand off and boxes your wrist-stump with her front paws.

If you're about to bathe your rat, and warn someone she gets so scared in water she poops everywhere, that's not an expression. It's fact. And you will not enjoy cleaning it up.

Tree frogs like trees. A lot. If you put your tree frog in a tree he will climb it. It will be extremely hard to get him back down.

Don't let the turtle go near the pool. He will jump in and swim the ten feet straight down, and he can swim a hell of a lot faster than you can. Then you'll have to take him to the vet.

Newts are very, very, VERY good at escaping from tanks.

So are frogs.

And turtles.

And bettas.

Just ... just get a screen for your tank.

Don't let your dog and bunny interact. The dog will end up shitting everywhere and running away in fear.

Bunnies do not have pawpads. They also do not have senses of humour. When you laugh at them for skidding across a wooden floor, they'll get very mad and ignore you until you apologize. They know what a sincere apology is. Don't try and fool them.

If a rabbit is angry at you and you do not apologize within a reasonable period of time, it has no qualms about shitting on everything you love ... and then eating it all.

Some rats get very territorial about the waterbottle. You may end up having to buy four waterbottles for four rats. Then again that may not make any difference. Your rat may just be an asshole.

If all your male rat does is sleep, it doesn't mean there's something wrong with him. It just means he's a male rat.

Dogs do not appreciate you blowing raspberries on your tummies.

Yes, goldfish are stupid enough to try and swim into the filter.

If you touch your turtle's nose he will bite you. Protip: turtles don't like letting go. And once they taste blood, they crave it forever.