Just sounds like you just have had lots of bad experiences. :P

Pretty much any time spent in front of your computer/TV(sometimes reading) while not being productive, is arguably a waste of time. On the other hand, if you have loads of free time outside work/study and want to enjoy yourself which is proven to be healthy especially if its stress releasing. Then have fun with the free time! Doesn't really matter if its sexual or blowing up heads, though masturbation related activities are supposed to be pretty awesome for reducing stress and bolstering confidence both beneficial for mental and physical health, so arguably productive!

I don't think I've had any intense investments, stress, bothersome obligations or awkward worrying regarding sexytime online, I haven't wastes time dealing with people being clingy, overly emotional or personally involved in RP for many years. I grew up, I know what I want and I don't waste time trying to get what I want from people that are weird, emotional unstable or awkward, I don't let it bug me either. If no is around that fits the bill, porn get! Just have fun and relax :U! Keep RPing if you enjoy it and if YOU are the one feeling attached and investing then maybe its just not right for you personally XD;

I've had good experiences and bad ones. The bad ones tended to be more frequent while the good ones were very intense. That's kind of what kept me going - pretty much the same principle by which someone blows their life savings at a casino. A variable ratio schedule of reinforcement produces the most intense responding that is the most resistant to extinction, if you want to get all behavioural about it.

While successfully finding a partner to RP with to climax would be stress releasing, not getting the RP that I wanted would be stress inducing, and this would occur far more frequently. It would make me feel bad about myself, make me feel bad for wasting my time, and make me feel unappreciated. I'm not saying that masturbation is bad; it's good for you and you are correct in implying that, in general, it has mental health benefits. But I am not talking about your occasional fap session before bed here, I'm talking about about a specific form of masturbation that sets up reinforcement in such a way that led to extreme seeking and guarding. Seeking and guarding that which is dependent on 'ducks being in a row' is unproductive, because it inevitably leads to the pain of not getting what one wants.

I'd rarely foster meaningful emotional attachment with anyone I RPed with online, but rather my attachment was to the activity itself. In this, others became a means to an end. I was essentially using people for my own pleasure. Granted they were doing the same to me, but two wrongs don't make a right; that still didn't clear me of the fact that wanting to typefuck with someone solely to experience personal pleasure is a deontological failing.

Trust me, I'm having fun and I am relaxing. I'm not denying myself anything I truly want. Its just that with reflection and understanding what one wants changes.

I dunno, sounds like you word a few tings to suit your depression about the issue. "Using people for your own pleasure, and others were doing it too, so that was two wrongs" That sounds like mutual pleasure and I see nothing wrong with that, Being selfish isn't an evil act, its normal. If we weren't self serving to a degree we'd never get ahead on our own or be independent. I think sex at its core is self serving cause.. if it doesn't get you off you aren't doing it right, ad that required some physical or mental self-interest. So again, don't see anything wrong with getting into somethings sexual that suits you without thinking of them too much.. That's really the only successful way of finding a good RP partner,, advertize what YOU want and see who bites XD; I mean they'd say no if they are not interested!

If getting turned down causes stress that kinda sucks, I'm usually on e621 enjoying porn before I even start to ping people I know, or dive by a club, if someone says they're busy or can't or getting laid already I just rotate my head a few degrees and admire the wonderful furreh prons. I don't really understand what you mean by seeking and guarding though? You'd havva explain that for me, I might be dumb XD;

I'm pleased that you have taken an interest in my wellbeing. That fills me with feelings of kindness.

Seeking and guarding are two elements of attachment. When you become attached to something you want to seek it out to have it, and once you have it you want to guard it to keep it from going away. However the problem with this is that the universe is infinitely creative; it will find ways to prevent you from getting what you want or to take what you want from you once you have it. When this happens one is filled with feelings of loss and dissatisfaction. The only way to not feel these negative feelings is to come to the realization that nothing is permanent, and that what you want will come and go as circumstances dictate. After this acceptance, seeking and guarding seem futile and unproductive. It doesn’t mean that you can't want things, its just an acceptance that they will always eventually leave you.

Bringing it back to the topic at hand, I simply realized that trying to find RP, especially RP that I like, is extremely difficult. Maybe things are different for you, but it involves such an intense amount of seeking and guarding, and treating people as tools to my happiness rather than people in of themselves, that the entire activity just seems tedious, vulgar, and wrong to me.

Trust me, I'm not depressed, I'm actually quite happy right now.

I agree with the everything is temporary, in a much bigger way than I mighta over recent years even. I also think most things are futile too, however some people may be attracted to hide and seek games. I enjoy being flirty, teasey and its reflected in my art, character. First impressions, and I like to think its my appeal, its temporary but fun while it lasts and if I'm smart and chose my partner right they understand that it's a fleeting fun and I'm just a cat, nothing special x3

I didn't mean to insinuate that you were depressed or emotionally in turmoil in general. I sometimes go on about how something sucks, or is bad or whatever and I'll adjust my vocabulary. Intentionally or habitually to suit my argument and ignore some of the positive variables associated with it, I call that being depressed about an issue. Not about life! I meant to say that something fun may have been lost to you and you seem displeased with prior issues.

Just pointing out that your issues are most likely shared among some people but are not universal, true for everyone or even right for some persons. In your case it may have been a moral issue, stressful or upsetting, but there are plenty of mutual partners who engage in sexual role play that just have fun. Like playing a FPS, chess, or any sort of interactive social game, but with their junk in hand :P

I'm just responding and learning, everyone has values and experiences to share and sex RP is an intrigue of mine, I feel bad that you haven't been having fun and I'm happy that you found a more enjoyable alternative. I didn't understand your perspective and now I understand it better, so mission accomplished! ^^