my childhood was weird
I mean fucking weird

I never went to middle school or highschool, so all the changes that happened to me growing up were all chemical and physical, and nothing mental

and now life has made me grow up, and now I am aware. More aware then I ever have been in my life

and I have been an asshole to everything and everyone around me

I am sorry.

I still want to kill myself, but now I want to even more, though now I really understand the consequences and who that would hurt, so I think that instead I will simply isolate myself completely

I am going to go to college, find a job where I can be alone, and work until I die.