It's come to my attention that my last journal sounded hurtful to a dear friend. He left me this comment on Skype.

"not saying this to be mean, but when you word your stuff like your friends mean nothing to you it hurts alot."

I want to set the record straight at least for my other friends that was not my intention. You guys DO mean a good deal to me. I can no more imagine my life without my puppy than I could if I were to lose you guys.

What I did mean in my journal was this. Back before my puppy, I had no sense of direction in my life. I was content just to take the first job I had and do it for the rest of my life if I were so lucky to keep it. I had little to look forward to in the life I was in. I didn't see anyone romantically, I had no ambition, and one of my only talents I could see was my writing (which I can't do much with at all really X3). The person I cared and admired most of all in this world has also been dead since my 8th grade year. Could have just been the depression I was once diagnosed with but I sincerely felt ready to die, that I had achieved all I was going to in my life.

Now with my puppy, I do feel like there is much more to do with my life again. I feel like sticking around on this world a little longer to hang out with some of the best friends I've ever had. Even if I should live to watch the world crumble I feel like I can do it now and that my life will mean more to everyone else for having had him in it. So to all the friends who's feelings I hurt with my last journal, I would like to say sorry to you all, and thank you for making this wild ride all the more fun and bearable. *hugs for everyone*