Oh yeah. I forgot I did this for her too. So for those curious.

01. [ ] They are possessed by an angel

02. [ ] They are possessed by a demon

03. [ ] They are a werewolf/vampire/faerie/dragon

04. [ ] They are physically strong

05. [ ] They have a rare hair/fur colour

06. [ ] Their eyes are an unusual colour

07. [ ] They happen to be red

08. [ ] Their eyes change colour

09. [ ] They have wings

10. [ ] They can grow extra body parts/shapeshift

11. [X] They are immortal (Ritually bound to immortal brother, providing her immortality)

12. [X] (if a female) they have large bra size (32C. Is that Mary Sue?)

13. [ ] (if a male) they are very muscular

14. [X] They are very attractive to the opposite gender (I don't think there is such a thing as an overweight, gross Aldaberan, and I don't think I've seen anyone say anything other than "Dat Ass, Hot!, I Want some of that! etc.)

15. [X] They are telekinetic/pyrokinetic/etc (Psychic. 'Most' Aldaberan's are.)

16. [X] They have sixth sense/can mind-read/etc (Psychic. Think sexy Prof X with working legs. XD )

17. [X] They have an object of some sort that gives them powers (Gem sets help focus psychic ability. Her natural focus requires her to wear less than others, but none would causer head exploding. [See Yawg's latest comic for details])

18. [ ] They have a special ability/power, but they don't know about it yet

19. [ ] They were bestowed/cursed with these powers

20. [ ] They are a healer

21. [X] They are from a very rich/royal family (1st/Only daughter of Royal Family.)

22. [ ] They don't know that they are from a very rich/royal background

23. [X] They have lost one/both of their parents (Outlived both, helped in the effort to take down father.)

24. [ ] They ran away from home

25. [X] Their parents are cruel, uncaring, abusive etc. (Unlike her brother, her father did not care for a daughter. Originally naming her 'Mistake' which the Queen changed to Mystic.)

26. [X] They witnessed one/both of their parent's death (Father was put to death before her. She didn't faulter in the slightest at this.)

27. [ ] They are part angel/demon/faerie/some other mythical creature

28. [ ] They never knew their parents

29. [X] They were abused/spoiled as a child (Other than father neglect, molested by her teachers, and nearly raped at 14; She enjoyed the perks of being royalty.)

30. [X] They are very attractive to the same gender (Her demeanor, flirtatious & instructive attitude, and gentle calm seems to draws both sexes to her.)

31. [ ] They have lots of friends/no friends

32. [ ] They are emo/cutesy

33. [X] They look much younger/older than they really are. (Body is locked in early 30s, as the ritual preserved the look)

34. [ ] They are currently in a relationship

35. [ ] They have lots of morals and state them a fair bit for example: 'I would rather be with my friends than with my boyfriend/girlfriend' 'Nothing matters more to me than my friends/family' 'I wouldn't hesitate to die in place of a friend' etc. It's fine if your OC has these beliefs/values, but if they constantly say them out loud/preach them to others, then we have a problem.

36. [X] They have a mental disorder (Megalomaniac, Sociopath)

37. [ ] They have an emotional disorder

38. [ ] They struggle to stay sane

39. [X] They are a psycho (Read: Sciopath!)

40. [ ] They have multiple personaities

41. [X] They are very intelligent (Calculating, methodic, plotting. . scary)

42. [ ] They have hallucinations

43. [ ] They can summon spirits/demons/angels etc.

44. [ ] They have an unusual/unrealistic pet

45. [X] They have a guardian spirit (her brother, Labrn, though any Aldaberan female with enough focus can call upon him. Does that count?)

46. [ ] They have a 'special type' of soul

47. [ ] Their soul is not the same as them

48. [X] They can talk to spirits/ghosts (Her powers could reach the dead. Any Aldaberan with enough focus and ethreal projection could.)

49. [ ] Some part of their body glows

50. [X] They have a rare/unusual name (Though I've seen other Mystics, her truest name is/was Mistake.)

51. [ ] They were born on an important date, such as New Year's Eve, Midsummers Night, The Winter Solstace etc.

52. [ ] They have a twin/sibling that they were separated from at birth [Though not marked, for Bon Bon, they are considered maternity twins]

53. [ ] They are connected with a certain element

54. [ ] They are connected with a certain animal

55. [X] They always dress like a certain 'label' (Glam or Vogue, perhaps? Victorian too. Something showy, revealing, decorted with some jewelry to match her gem set.)

56. [X] They look quite a bit like a character from a popular anime/manga (Like any other Aldaberan, she resembles Jenny from Bucky O'hare)

57. [X] They are a race/species that is discriminated against/misunderstood (Aldaberans are called 'witches' and shown with distrust since no one knows just how powerful they are.)

58. [X] They have a certain power that is misunderstood/feared (Their psychic powers are unknown by most. Their prime directive being "Never let an outsider see the full extent of our powers" or any of their powers if possible.)

59. [ ] They live/lived on the streets at some point in their lives

60. [ ] They are hiding from someone/something

61. [ ] They have a rare blood type

62. [ ] They cry blood

63. [ ] Certain noises/smells/situations/etc make their powers activate/give them a nervous breakdown

64. [ ] They are from a different country to where they live

65. [X] They are very mysterious/dark (Other than hiding how powerful she is, a constant smile of hidden intent with soul piercing eyes to boot. Sima Yi comes to mind)

66. [ ] They are very lively/happy

67. [ ] Their mood changes a lot/very quickly

68. [X] They are very patient (Cool, calculating. . save for a few very specific triggers that upset her. [Don't get it in her hair!])

69. [ ] They are from a long line of (insert profession/power here)

70. [X] They have a piece of jewelry/clothing that they always wear (If you don't know what this is, shame on you!)

71. [ ] They have amnesia

72. [ ] They have some sort of permanent medical condition

73. [ ] They have a curse upon them

74. [ ] They are involved in some sort of prophecy

75. [ ] They are 'the chosen one'

76. [ ] They have insomnia



Overall points: 26



Point Reductions

Take points off your OCs overall score if they fit any of the following statements:


1. [ ] They smoke

2. [ ] They are an alcoholic

3. [ ] They are overweight

4. [X] They are addicted: drugs, sex, etc. (She enjoys herself, however she wants)

5. [ ] They have a short temper

6. [X] They enjoy bullying others (For her own pleasure, a 'verbal put down-er. Never really physically bullying.)

7. [X] They do not care much about others (When you live for so long, you don't see mortals in the same light anymore. There is truly one 1 person she cares about other than herself. Guess who. :P)

8. [X] They are emotionless (Though hints of them, other than rage, she is a rather blank slate.)


Final Score is: 22


<5 -Anti-Sue Your character may be a bit on the boring side. Of course, this does depend, but generally if they are scoring that low, it wouldn't hurt to 'spice them up' a bit ^^;

6-15 -Balanced Character If your OC scored around here, then they are probably quite a well-balanced and interesting character. Those scoring in the higher end of this category may be a bit too much though.

16-25 -Borderline Mary-Sue We have a problem. You need to tone your character down. They are most likely a bit annoying to others, too.

26< -Mary-Sue Oh dear. Do I really need to comment on this?


Again, a few points that over lap, so Balls to that, but this is Mystic. First of a series of experimental "genetically altered" children of the royal family in an attempt to make "the perfect Aldaberan." It nearly worked for the king, except the first was a female. That didn't please him, and she was named Mistake. Her mother, the queen, quickly interveened that he meant "Mystic" and was referring to mistake about something else. Mystic learned of this, and that helped to carve the woman she would become. Resented by her father, she was tucked away for teaching. Though he seemed to hate her, he did at least see the value of testing this child's limits and sent her to train with the 3 most powerful Psychers the king had.

They too looked down upon a female student, but found their own sport in teaching her "forbidden lord" in exchange for peep shows and the like when she began to develop [Aldaberans age in 7s. 1-7 child, 8-14 teen, 15-21 young adult] So when she reached age category 3, they began asking for more than just looks. Though aware of their lecherous ways, she schemed to get them back, in time. Of coarse, they couldn't just take the virginity of the princess, no, but there were 'so many ways around that' they would tell themselves. She grabbed every tome she could while they were distracted by the pleasure. So the beginning of a very manipulative sense of self preservation began at 14. She learned that she, eventually, had a brother and so wanted to meet him, but was sequestered in her training as he was. The king demanded perfection of his children and so they were sent to train and train until there was nothing left for them to learn. At one out break, she had run away from the training and was assaulted by some drunken males who nearly raped her, but she was rescued by two male guards (one of which was bi, the other gay) who would instruct her in the sexual arts. . not entirely at their will, but they did not have powers like her.

Then came the sex wars, risen up from the male oppression. Mystic, overhearing the plans of making her brother an immortal weapon, not only informed the female resistance, but had found in one of the ancient tomes a way to bind her life force to her brother, thinking to make herself just as immortal. It worked. The females overthrew the men with their resources poured into Labrn, and surgical strikes within lead by Mystic. She happily slaughtered the three perverted teachers and then captured her father, after a rather 'strange' daddy/daughter interaction (you pervs :P) and didn't smile at his execution... "Your right father, Mistake is the correct term to use with me. A mistake to cross, a mistake to abandon, a mistake to neglect. . I'd go on, but you're dead." ... until his eyes rolled back in his head. From there, she would instruct and play with the hearts and minds of every student who came to her instruction, every one a pawn to make sure things ran smooth to her liking. Each generation, whispers of "just how powerful is Mother Mystic" would reach her ears, driving that Megalomania wheel.

She never usurped the queen, saw no need as she was already in control. . but when arguments, fights, and near revolution broke out to do something about her brother Labrn, a growing hatred for her own kind began to rise. "He defends them, loves them, and all they see is that stupid curse father placed upon him. Like foolish kittens they are. I must. . I must. . ." and after an attempted public assassination of her brother, that of coarse failed, Mystic had had enough. With very careful planning and enchantments placed upon her brother (not that he knew for she had forgotten lore no one knew of, and for his own good and protection) she plotted a near genocide of all sisters who opposed her and her brother. This would nearly succeed (90%) but drove Labrn crazy. So she shielded his mind from it all and they went into Exile, leaving their kind and pursuing whatever whim they imagined.