The biggest hurdle in going back to school is not the schoolwork itself so far, it's time management. I'm trying to balance full time school with a ~25 hour work week and moving is proving difficult. In hindsight, I should have tried earlier and harder to get those work study jobs. the ability to work and study/do homework is something that I really need right now. Although in the beginning I wanted to go to school to get a better job and such, I am finding the abundance of knowledge irresistible, even at the community college I am going to, not even some esteemed university. I had all the intention of checking out Music production related stuff while I was there, but finding time to DO everything is proving a ridiculously enormous task...

The fact that, and I'm not playing showoff here, I'm pretty much getting a full ride for up to 12 semesters with the Pell Grant is something I'm finding invaluable. I would not be able to go if not for that grant, and it's amazing.

I also find myself jumping headfirst and way ahead of all the schoolwork I've been assigned. As is stands I am already done with next weeks assignments, even though I've not been assigned them yet. Granted, this is in preparation for moving, but nonetheless..

On the flip side I am highly annoyed at my work for giving me over 30 hours this week, and I expressed my dislike. Even though it's a holiday weekend, I simply can not juggle that amount of work on top everything. all that would translate to working a 80 hour work week, counting outside-school work. Insane. They seemingly shrugged their shoulders at this and said there was nothing they could do, because they're shorthanded. Someone I work with apparently took one of my days off my hands, but I still plan on calling off tomorrow on principle.

I'm not normally a dick. I work hard, and do above what is expected of me. In my first week there they told me it was like I was working there for years, and I've tried to surpass what was expected of me thereof. I don't think it is too much to ask that I be given a bit of a break when I'm back in school. I could just as well find somewhere else to work and leave for the season just like everyone else.

So, me being assertive, huh? That's a strange feeling.

All this wraps up into what I had been reading in English and something I'm finding to be very true in my case (my english teacher, BTW, is fucking hot.). "Learning to Read" by Malcolm X. What I am finding to be absolutely true is that Knowledge really IS power. The more I learn the better I feel about myself, and the better I understand and can handle the things around me. I'm addicted to learning, and it is something that I would have never had if I went to college right out of school. I am beginning to hold knowledge in very high regards, and I am finding myself rather intolerant of people stepping on my ability to do so.

In fact in an ideal scenario I wouldn't have to work. I would absolutely love to just go to school and have all my time to learn new things. Work Study is the next best thing in my eyes, and it's something I am absolutely going to pursue as strongly as I can.

The more and more I go the school, the more and more I care more about gaining knowledge than I do about getting a career, which is extremely weird to me. (Granted, I do care about getting a career!)

Anyway, these are my thoughts ATM.