just some things
13 years ago
General
ओम श्री गणेश फिर नामा.
सब जो पढ़ने इस धन्य हो और शांति पता चलो.
चलो मुझे तैयार है और तैयार बातें मैं जरूरत
हम सभी पर समृद्धि और शांति की चमक चलो
सब जो पढ़ने इस धन्य हो और शांति पता चलो.
चलो मुझे तैयार है और तैयार बातें मैं जरूरत
हम सभी पर समृद्धि और शांति की चमक चलो
I have a lot of things i would like to post Both angry and hopeful. I have a lot i would like to do but honestly i am barely online right now since real life is so damn important right now. when i am on it is because i am either walking up or gong to bed or simply sitting for a few so i can try to continue doing shit. i was not even home at all on Sunday. most days i am trying so fucking hard to push past the pain to do things that i am not on. I say this cause i am getting a little tired of some people acting like if i am not on it is because i have a hate on for them. I really really really do not need one more fucking negative thing.
and because i know that (thankfully) most every person i know has no fucking idea what living with chronic pain is like i will tell you something beyond the Spoon analogy which simply tells how it is to deal with it. I thought of something that MOST people have had to deal with. the flu. Have you ever had one of those Flu episodes where every muscle and joint hurts beyond anything you want to stand so you either medicate to no end or sleep it off. the kind where you can feel a wind current cause it feels like it is bruising you. those kinds of Flu that make you wish you could turn off existence for a few days so you can feel better. Imagine that that NEVER ENDS! Period. it is with you every mother fucking minute of every fucking day. but you are not sniffling and sneezing or shitting your brains out. just the pain. so no one sees that you are in that pain. but you are and people expect you to just push through it every fucking day. Oh and forget your fucking pain pills. those are actually just tic tacs and do not even taste good. that is your every fucking day. and unlike with a flu you cannot take off a day or week and get back into the swing cause it never fucking ends. ever. you just have to get used to it and try to push through when every single thing in your hurts. and your every movement makes the pain more.
welcome to my world. yes i sometimes seem to deal with it better than others but that does not mean i am cured or better. it simply means i had a day i could deal with it better.
and because i know that (thankfully) most every person i know has no fucking idea what living with chronic pain is like i will tell you something beyond the Spoon analogy which simply tells how it is to deal with it. I thought of something that MOST people have had to deal with. the flu. Have you ever had one of those Flu episodes where every muscle and joint hurts beyond anything you want to stand so you either medicate to no end or sleep it off. the kind where you can feel a wind current cause it feels like it is bruising you. those kinds of Flu that make you wish you could turn off existence for a few days so you can feel better. Imagine that that NEVER ENDS! Period. it is with you every mother fucking minute of every fucking day. but you are not sniffling and sneezing or shitting your brains out. just the pain. so no one sees that you are in that pain. but you are and people expect you to just push through it every fucking day. Oh and forget your fucking pain pills. those are actually just tic tacs and do not even taste good. that is your every fucking day. and unlike with a flu you cannot take off a day or week and get back into the swing cause it never fucking ends. ever. you just have to get used to it and try to push through when every single thing in your hurts. and your every movement makes the pain more.
welcome to my world. yes i sometimes seem to deal with it better than others but that does not mean i am cured or better. it simply means i had a day i could deal with it better.
sunspot
~sunspot
yup...I know the feeling, back injury compliments of the US Navy.
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