I am leaving this all behind.

I have orders from several, including therapist, my college professor, and of course, my beloved mate to stay away from my ex, on the reasoning that all talking with him does is hurt me, and I don't need that. I agree with them. And since my passive side likes taking and following orders... I shall obey them.

For some reason, some don't accept my being willing to comply with orders. I don't understand that really. I love being me now, and part of me is that I like submitting. If someone can't understand or accept that, their problem, not mine.

My mate is particularly good about not ordering me around without my explicit permission. He doesn't take advantage of my willingness to submit, but rather uses it to help me, for which I love him all the more for.

To those of you who care, and even those who don't but read anyway... goodbye.