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Why I'm not on 2 Sense any more (warning, long post is LONG)
17 years ago
've been meaning to say something about this for a while, but it's one of those things that's hard to phrase. Still, it's better to put an official statement out than leave it to the grapevine of conjecture and rumor.
Have you ever had a friend that you only liked in small doses? Someone you could play a game with, or watch a movie with, but after a while you just didn't want to be around anymore? They'd just get on your nerves, you'd get on theirs, and if you were around each other for too long you'd both end up pissed off. After some time apart you could be totally cool again, but that length of time was dependent on how long you were stuck together the last time.
Well, imagine living with that person. If they get on your nerves you can't really get away because you're always under the same roof. Little stuff will build up, and soon individual problems become enormous because of all of the other things attached. Communication breaks down, hostilities expand as you end up talking through other people, and things get ugly.
Now when I had problems with the roommates at my first apartment, we had a light at the end of the tunnel. We made plans to go our separate ways when the lease ended, and that knowledge made us able to cope. After some time the problems we had evaporated and I'm actually happy to run into both of them when I see them at conventions. If I was in an apartment with 2, I would have done the same thing, and I don't think there would have been any hard feelings over the decision.
Unfortunately instead of being a roommate, I was now the landlord. Faced with someone I didn't want to live with anymore, there was no gentle way to do it. I had to tell him I didn't want to live with him anymore, and I had to deal with all of the consequences surrounding it. It definitely wasn't an easy thing to do, but with the support of a good friend I was able to work myself up to have the discussion and set things into motion.
Initially it went pretty well. We had an agreement that there was an ending to things, but the date was open based on some factors. Then stuff started moving out slowly, and he was still paying rent on his room while in transition. Then the confusion came into play.
Lack of communication along the way made the end of things get kinda ugly, and there was a conflict when I wanted to know if he was going to keep paying and when the rest of the stuff was moving out. We worked that out and I actually brought the last of his stuff over to his new place just to get things over with.
We still saw each other for con meetings while prepping FCN, but we didn't hang out. With con prep and school taking up a lot of my time I relied on people calling me up when they wanted to do stuff, spending more nights with nobody over or very small groups instead of the larger gatherings that had been over in the past. Still in need of time to heal the wounds, I never included him in the planning when I had people over. I didn't exclude him either, but we pretty much settled into our own separate circles of locals to hang out with.
He told me at an FCN staff meeting that Jibba was going to do the season opener. I mentioned that being a bit weird since it wouldn't really fit with the flow of the season closer, since I was fighting the zombie babies by his side after Jibba ran off. He didn't seem concerned with the continuity, and it was left at that. Then the show started getting recorded without him telling me that the tapings were going on, while other people I knew were getting invited.
He did ask me to do one episode of 2 Sense for the new season, the March 24th episode. He was taping on a Monday night so he could have it wrapped up before he went to Megaplex. I had school that night, and I told him I'd head over right after class, expecting the show to be ready to tape at 8 PM. This would wrap the show up by 10, then I'd be able to get enough sleep for work the next day. He told me he wanted to wait for Jibba to be free from work, pushing the start of taping back by more than an hour. I told him to just do the show with Jibba because I couldn't stay up that late and be functional for work the next day.
After that I still didn't hear about tapings. I didn't find out the plan for the FCN recording until about an hour before we went live. After the show I apologized for deciding not to do that one show, and he seemed to accept that. However, I still didn't get word of tapings even after expressly asking for them. Finally I asked him directly if I was still a co-host or if I was done with the show.
He gave me a good explanation, one that I couldn't argue with in the slightest. He likes recording the show with friends. Since the move, we hadn't really been friends. The chemistry was gone. He did like the job I had done on the show in the past, and the FCN show went quite well, but with nothing else in common he didn't want me on the show. And I agreed.
I knew it was a consequence of not living with him any more, but it wasn't enough of a point for me to keep living with him. I honestly expected it to be thrown out there as a ploy to not have to move, and if it had come up at that point I would have quit right there. Instead of a bang during it argument, it came as a whimper when I asked him about it point blank. I wish he would have been more direct and told me without being prompted, but it could have seemed like a "neener neener" sort of thing if he did it that way. Much like the whole need to move out, there wasn't a perfect way to take care of things.
So that's the story. I won't be co-hosting anytime soon, but never say never. So if you only care about me and my account because of 2 Sense, you might as well unsubscribe. The itch to perform is still there, so I might just end up doing my own thing down the road. Thanks for reading :)
Have you ever had a friend that you only liked in small doses? Someone you could play a game with, or watch a movie with, but after a while you just didn't want to be around anymore? They'd just get on your nerves, you'd get on theirs, and if you were around each other for too long you'd both end up pissed off. After some time apart you could be totally cool again, but that length of time was dependent on how long you were stuck together the last time.
Well, imagine living with that person. If they get on your nerves you can't really get away because you're always under the same roof. Little stuff will build up, and soon individual problems become enormous because of all of the other things attached. Communication breaks down, hostilities expand as you end up talking through other people, and things get ugly.
Now when I had problems with the roommates at my first apartment, we had a light at the end of the tunnel. We made plans to go our separate ways when the lease ended, and that knowledge made us able to cope. After some time the problems we had evaporated and I'm actually happy to run into both of them when I see them at conventions. If I was in an apartment with 2, I would have done the same thing, and I don't think there would have been any hard feelings over the decision.
Unfortunately instead of being a roommate, I was now the landlord. Faced with someone I didn't want to live with anymore, there was no gentle way to do it. I had to tell him I didn't want to live with him anymore, and I had to deal with all of the consequences surrounding it. It definitely wasn't an easy thing to do, but with the support of a good friend I was able to work myself up to have the discussion and set things into motion.
Initially it went pretty well. We had an agreement that there was an ending to things, but the date was open based on some factors. Then stuff started moving out slowly, and he was still paying rent on his room while in transition. Then the confusion came into play.
Lack of communication along the way made the end of things get kinda ugly, and there was a conflict when I wanted to know if he was going to keep paying and when the rest of the stuff was moving out. We worked that out and I actually brought the last of his stuff over to his new place just to get things over with.
We still saw each other for con meetings while prepping FCN, but we didn't hang out. With con prep and school taking up a lot of my time I relied on people calling me up when they wanted to do stuff, spending more nights with nobody over or very small groups instead of the larger gatherings that had been over in the past. Still in need of time to heal the wounds, I never included him in the planning when I had people over. I didn't exclude him either, but we pretty much settled into our own separate circles of locals to hang out with.
He told me at an FCN staff meeting that Jibba was going to do the season opener. I mentioned that being a bit weird since it wouldn't really fit with the flow of the season closer, since I was fighting the zombie babies by his side after Jibba ran off. He didn't seem concerned with the continuity, and it was left at that. Then the show started getting recorded without him telling me that the tapings were going on, while other people I knew were getting invited.
He did ask me to do one episode of 2 Sense for the new season, the March 24th episode. He was taping on a Monday night so he could have it wrapped up before he went to Megaplex. I had school that night, and I told him I'd head over right after class, expecting the show to be ready to tape at 8 PM. This would wrap the show up by 10, then I'd be able to get enough sleep for work the next day. He told me he wanted to wait for Jibba to be free from work, pushing the start of taping back by more than an hour. I told him to just do the show with Jibba because I couldn't stay up that late and be functional for work the next day.
After that I still didn't hear about tapings. I didn't find out the plan for the FCN recording until about an hour before we went live. After the show I apologized for deciding not to do that one show, and he seemed to accept that. However, I still didn't get word of tapings even after expressly asking for them. Finally I asked him directly if I was still a co-host or if I was done with the show.
He gave me a good explanation, one that I couldn't argue with in the slightest. He likes recording the show with friends. Since the move, we hadn't really been friends. The chemistry was gone. He did like the job I had done on the show in the past, and the FCN show went quite well, but with nothing else in common he didn't want me on the show. And I agreed.
I knew it was a consequence of not living with him any more, but it wasn't enough of a point for me to keep living with him. I honestly expected it to be thrown out there as a ploy to not have to move, and if it had come up at that point I would have quit right there. Instead of a bang during it argument, it came as a whimper when I asked him about it point blank. I wish he would have been more direct and told me without being prompted, but it could have seemed like a "neener neener" sort of thing if he did it that way. Much like the whole need to move out, there wasn't a perfect way to take care of things.
So that's the story. I won't be co-hosting anytime soon, but never say never. So if you only care about me and my account because of 2 Sense, you might as well unsubscribe. The itch to perform is still there, so I might just end up doing my own thing down the road. Thanks for reading :)
I feel that the internal issues between you two have absolutely nothing to do with any of the rest of us, and thus there is no reason why we can't support you and 2 in your separate ventures. Good luck to you and hope to see more from you soon.
It would be rather shallow of people to ignore either of you because of the falling out you two had. It's really none of their business anyways. You both are good people who do good work to make people laugh. **grins**
As Eclypse stated, I, too, shall offer my support you and 2 separately. I did not watch you because of 2 Sense, as you put it, I watch you because I wanted to check out your submissions. As well, wishing to be friends. :)
I will say this, however... you were quite a funny co-host for the show, and I miss your antics very much. I look forward to your future endeavours. :)
I hope you've enjoyed the few things I've put out so far, and I'll be working on more. I'm on messengers all the time, feel free to shoot me a line sometime. I try to be entertaining in chats as well :)
I've enjoyed your material you've given to us. I should continue reading your stuff when you bring it out for us. I could make do with some reading material when I'm on the train going to AC, since it's a three-day ride from Vancouver, with a bus ride to Seattle and a stop point in Chicago.
I watch you because you're my friend, so no unsubscribing for me. :P
I have all the ones before it downloaded, I've just never listened to them. x3
But bah. Besides being friends, I also watch ya in hopes that you'll submit more writings. >.>
It does not mean I will not look for you and glomp you for a hug at a Con.
You are still after all Nik of Nine.
<3
My ears await. :)
You were a great co-host that always provided a balanced mixture of brisk wit and humorous cheer. But I'm afraid that since you're no longer a part of The Crew now, you're pretty much expendable and will surely degenerate at a rapid rate into the fameless pathetic oblivion. Just kidding ;3
You've earned your fair share of respect and admiration, and a lot of people who monitored your activity solely because of 2Sense connection hadn't lost any reason to keep you in the aperture of their attention. I, for one, will be stalking around.
job on the show when you often played the "voice of reason" when 2 would get more ranty. I personally found your appearances to be quite fun to listen to. I think that your work on 2 sense should be enough to garner a fan base of your own if you decide to do on a show of your own.
Good to know you found me entertaining, thanks old friend :)