Good things come to those who wait, as it is said. However, this is not a good thing, as Voice had just returned from watching Stephenie Meyer “Breaking Dawn part 2” directed by the returning Bill Condon, with screen writing done by the returning Melissa Rosenberg …who wrote nearly every Twilight based movie since the films where conceived. And honestly, I feel no pity for either of the gluttonous bastards as they continue this series. However, there is good news! This movie isn’t nearly as bad as the rest of them!
Not saying it is good, but it is… adequate. About as adequate as a movie with necrophilia, pedophilia, and zoophilia can be.
Like before, this review will be separated into three pros and three cons. But before that, Previews!

Warm Bodies: Brilliant, I say go see this movie. It is a zombie version of Romeo and Juliet…with humor!
Now you see it: A Crime movie based around Magic Tricks. I want to see this, holds a lot of potential. Also Morgan Freeman is in it.
Mama: Produced by Guillermo del Toro, so it has a very strong chance of being good.
Parental Guidance: Directed by Andy Fickman, another maybe movie though the humor seems hilarious. I recommend seeing this.

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Pros: There are very few pros in this movie, but there are a few…and not really needing to stretch for them.
• The Visuals: To be more specific, the beginning visuals of the movie as the movie has a theme of snow and blood in it, often times with red of white which added to an amazing contrast. The beginning had these amazing visuals of the transformation of water into snow and ice – seeing it freeze over the leaves and roses adding to the amazing contrast. While most of the CGI was mediocre at best, the CGI on the Wolves are amazing even if they look like they came directly from a video game.
(Kind of cheating here, but it should be noted that the scene between Jacob and Bella’s father is hilarious. And all men should strip before their partner going “The world you live in isn’t what you think”.)
• The Fight scene: The battle scene near the end of the movie is possibly the most amazing thing ever in the Twilight saga. Compared to the symbolic fight scene in Eclipse, which focused on a ‘breaking glass’ feel, this fight scene is more realistic. Gritty. It seems to be more about the fact that it is a fight of survival then to a fight of who is right and wrong. This is a fight scene to remember in the sense of it’s not totally anime-esch, focusing on vampires trying to exploit each other’s weakness: The head. And Fire.
• The grittiness: My god is this movie DARK compared to the other ones. It is dark in the sense of an immortal child watching his mother being brutal murdered by other vampires, before being burned. And then throwing said kid into the fire.

Cons: Oooooooh boy, again, only three.
• Characters: This is perhaps the weakest of the movies in terms of characters, and that is saying something. If you are not virtuously good, you are moustache twirling evil in this universe. Perhaps this is Meyer’s writing, or Rosenberg’s, but this universe is just filled with upstanding heroes, angst ridden werewolves, or “MWHAHAHAHA” evil gentlemen. And those that don’t fit into any of the categories get no more than 10 lines throughout the entire movie. It is ridiculous how much the characters are less character and more stereotypes. Hell, even Wendell Pierce’s cameo was less of a character and a stereotype fixer named J. Jenks. Think about it…
(Renesmee has the “dead children” eyes that caused me nightmares. The eyes were CGed on and…just looked odd on her. Hell, half the time Renesmee was CGIed and it looked straight up CREEPY.)
• The Romance: Stale as last week’s bread left out on the counter in 90 degree weather. This has been a subject of much debate and for good reason. Next subject.
• The Ending: My god…I do not wish to spoil anything for anyone – but I must say that the movie as two twist endings which both fail hard. There are no hints to either of them, the first is literally pulling the “It was all a Dream Card” and the second one…well…the second one caused much rage in the small group I went to watch it with. After the two shitty twists the movie proceeds on for another ten minutes with fake out fade to blacks. It then proceeds to show that everyone gets their happy endings, and that Edward and Bella are going to love each other forever and ever and ever. The ending tasted of old spaghetti, and left the taste of cigarettes on the tip of my tongue.

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Conclusion: This is the strongest movie out of the saga, yes, but this movie is not worth ANYONE’S time that isn’t a hardcore fan. And my question still hangs in the air without an answer: Why does anyone like this story? It is filled with nothing but a house wives wet dream and failed characters – and those characters that actually had interesting subjects on them were shoved into the back to make sure that other, certain MAIN characters could prove that they could handle the entire situations by themselves without wasting an hour and half of my time. I could edit this movie, and trim it down to 30 minutes at the most to get the entire point across.

So...all in all, this was a shitty movie. I want the last two hours of my life back, and I want to know why people like this series. This is a shitty conclusion to a shitty series.


4 Crowns out of 10
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