So, of course, today is the last day of the year. Overall, 2012 admittedly was probably the worst year for me so far. I found myself struggling with a lot of aspects of myself and trying to learn to understand and cope with them, and although I still haven't gotten over many things, I feel as if I have made progress. 2012 marked my final full year as a legal teenager, which in itself was enough to put me on edge for the majority of it, but I am looking forward to turning eighteen and gaining more freedoms with it.

To go along with the typical 'reflection' journal, I thought of 12 points about this year, some good, some not so good, and some which are neither good nor bad.

1. I learned that my reality is much more than I can see. This is likely the thing I've struggled with the most, as I find myself desperately trying to hold on to the physical reality because I fear complete isolation from it. I am still learning to balance the two sides of me, but hopefully in the coming year I will make more progress.

2. I had and lost a relationship, and found my heart broken a few times by those I had feelings for, but whom didn't have them back.

3. I found myself exploring different connections with my little world, and establishing a timeline for it. I have been wanting to tinker with this more, and am thinking about starting a new art/writing project for next year (will post more about it later).

4. I started a personal blog as a means to get my thoughts out when I can't bring myself to tell them to others, or to process my thoughts before telling others. Although recently it's become more of a dumping place for my writing and character notes, it has helped me in other things as well.

5. I got in touch with a group of friends whom, at the start of the year, I only had a passing acquaintance. Through them, I found my little online 'niche', if you want to call it that.

6. I've allowed myself to open up not only to myself, but others.

7. Art-wise, I learned to use Sai. Although I haven't posted as much art as I hoped, I still think it's improving, and I hope to post more in the future.

8. Jerry, my main cub fursona, will be turning five on June 8th (the numerical opposite of my birthday, August 6th). Coincidentally, June 3rd will mark my 5th year on FurAffinity, but that wasn't the reason for me aging him up. I simply felt it would fit my personal growth in the physical world.

9. I started a story that got to 18 and a half chapters before it fizzled out, which is my biggest writing accomplishment thus far. I hope to return to it eventually, but if not oh well.

10. I gained a furry brother, Cody. :3 Although I tend to not do the typical 'furfamily' thing, I am thinking about opening mine up a bit more.

11. I've started to think more and more about what I want to do with my life, college, and career.

12. I opened up a bit to a few of my real-life friends. Although I'm still a bit away from being completely comfortable there, it's still progress.

That's probably good enough for now. I'm sure I am missing something important, but I don't want to make this journal too long, so I'll end it by saying that I hope everyone has a happy New Year!

- Jerry