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Rant.
13 years ago
Ok well first off the realization that I'm going to be gone here in 3 days has finally hit me like a truck. I'm pretty much freaking the fuck out and I can't control it. I'm making myself sick with stress. I was able to 'acquire' anti-anxiety pills for the drive but I need to hold off taking them til I'm actually driving.
Here's my trip: https://maps.google.com/maps?saddr=.....mp;t=m&z=4
If anyone was curious.
Now anyway, for the rant..
Kris came home today, and woke me up by asking whether it would be better to get a girl or boy dog. I stared at him in horror. We have two dogs but I'm taking them with me because we very well know he's not going to be able to keep any of the animals we have due to him losing his job somewhere relatively soon in the future. If taking care of himself is going to be difficult why on earth would he put a dog through that. Here's kind of how the conversation went:
Him: *comes into bedroom and counts money we have* Would a girl or boy dog be better to have alone or train and stuff.
Me: Why on earth would you get a dog you can't keep.
Him: You're taking all the animals I don't want to be alone. I need something to keep me motivated. I want someone to run with etc etc.
Me: UM. We have two dogs and you've only taken one of them running once. More than a year ago.
Him: Well I'm in a slump! I really need to lose weight! Why can't you support me!!
Me: I do support you, but I'm not going to stand by you while you put a dog through that, they aren't objects.
Him: I would find it a good home! So which one should I get? Someone is selling puppies on the side of the road.
Me: NO. IT IS WRONG. DO NOT DO IT.
Him: FINE.
Yeah so then I have THAT on me now, because he's super pissed off on me and that's not helping. He kind of stormed out a bit. And that's how I woke up this morning. And on top of having to re-home the poor thing in less than a year, he is notorious for not having any at-home responsibility. If it wasn't for me cleaning and taking care of the animals our whole time being together they'd die. No exaggeration at all. Proof being last year I got into a really bad depression slump and could hardly get myself up let alone do chores and our dog got pretty thin because he wouldn't step up and care for her.. Never again will I leave the responsibility of another life with him. I think since we've moved he's fed the dogs once, cat 4x, and the rest of them never. Sigh. I hate having him pissed at me especially right before I leave but I won't let him walk all over me. OH, and funny part is, about the whole being alone thing, he would NEVER COME HOME ANYWAY. He only comes home to guilt me into sleeping with him then leaves to his friends to play video games. -_-
Here's my trip: https://maps.google.com/maps?saddr=.....mp;t=m&z=4
If anyone was curious.
Now anyway, for the rant..
Kris came home today, and woke me up by asking whether it would be better to get a girl or boy dog. I stared at him in horror. We have two dogs but I'm taking them with me because we very well know he's not going to be able to keep any of the animals we have due to him losing his job somewhere relatively soon in the future. If taking care of himself is going to be difficult why on earth would he put a dog through that. Here's kind of how the conversation went:
Him: *comes into bedroom and counts money we have* Would a girl or boy dog be better to have alone or train and stuff.
Me: Why on earth would you get a dog you can't keep.
Him: You're taking all the animals I don't want to be alone. I need something to keep me motivated. I want someone to run with etc etc.
Me: UM. We have two dogs and you've only taken one of them running once. More than a year ago.
Him: Well I'm in a slump! I really need to lose weight! Why can't you support me!!
Me: I do support you, but I'm not going to stand by you while you put a dog through that, they aren't objects.
Him: I would find it a good home! So which one should I get? Someone is selling puppies on the side of the road.
Me: NO. IT IS WRONG. DO NOT DO IT.
Him: FINE.
Yeah so then I have THAT on me now, because he's super pissed off on me and that's not helping. He kind of stormed out a bit. And that's how I woke up this morning. And on top of having to re-home the poor thing in less than a year, he is notorious for not having any at-home responsibility. If it wasn't for me cleaning and taking care of the animals our whole time being together they'd die. No exaggeration at all. Proof being last year I got into a really bad depression slump and could hardly get myself up let alone do chores and our dog got pretty thin because he wouldn't step up and care for her.. Never again will I leave the responsibility of another life with him. I think since we've moved he's fed the dogs once, cat 4x, and the rest of them never. Sigh. I hate having him pissed at me especially right before I leave but I won't let him walk all over me. OH, and funny part is, about the whole being alone thing, he would NEVER COME HOME ANYWAY. He only comes home to guilt me into sleeping with him then leaves to his friends to play video games. -_-
Also friend is a dude and I'm not sure he's into that. :v
I would have a few months back when we kind of did break up but if I didn't try and patch things up I'd be in a worse place than I am now. We've known eachother since we were 16 though, and been married over 3 years, it would feel like a lot of time wasted just because the military lifestyle turned him into a douche bag.
I know things will work out though, I'm going to be able to get out and be independent again and that's at least a step in the right direction. Whether things will work with him in the picture is up to him.
He was always pretty immature but at least back before the military he had more emotions than just 'angry'.
I've got high hopes for the future!
Just sucks that I have to deal with mr. selfish drama queen on top of everything else. x_x
Hole
He doesn't really want something to take care of he just saw 'cute' puppy and wanted to try and guilt trip me into letting him get it. We both know he wouldn't walk it let alone feed it, and he actually agreed with me later on in the day.
Don't feel guilty-you did the right thing saying no.