here's a lovely story for you!

Yesterday, I was really fuckin' sleepy. I mean REALLY fuckin' sleepy, and usually I had wednesday and thursday nights off, so I called in to work to ask if indeed I DID have work on thursday night, last night. So, I call in to work around 6pm, 'cos stupid me, I haven't slept yet... and I asked, "Am I working tonight?"
The guy says, "Oh, hold on, lemme check..."
Then, "Night of the fifth? Nope, you're off."
So I said "Waaaaitwaitwaitwait--My schedules are assigned to me by the MORNING I go OFF the clock."
So he says, "Ah, lemme check again..."
then, "Morning of the sixth? Nope, You're off!"
So I was like, "YES!!!"
and WHAM! OUT COLD.

I slept, and slept, and slept, and lo and behold, 11 hours later, I wake up to the buzzing of my cell phone. Apparantly, I have A VOICE MESSAGE. The voice message came at around 7:40 pm, about an hour and forty minutes (DUH) since I went to SLEEP, and it was the second shift supervisor of security saying "Oh, by the way, so-and-so mentioned that you called to see whether or not you are working tonight. Guess what. You're working tonight. See you at 11 o'clock".

So obviously, I was like,
".....sssssSSSSSS<b>SSSHHHHH<i>HHHHHIIIIIIII<u>IIIIITTTTTTTT!!!</b></u></i>
since I found this message at FIVE IN THE FUCKING MORNING.

asdjfkl;ahgirewlhaifhauifvhureahiufhajshfvhafwaiehfuiawehifhuahufhupewahfl
!!!!!>_<;!!!!!

So. I go about my day as usual. I draw, I chat it up with MAH HOMIES,
and finally it comes time to GO TO WORK. So, I walk to work. I call up the security office to ask them to let me in, all sheepish and embarassed with "hey. I'm ... actually here tonight..."

Shortly thereafter, Lackey #3 and THE BIG, BIG, BOSS MAN march up to the door, and he does NOT look happy.

AHHHHHHHHHHHGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIP
GUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILT
TRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPG
UILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTT
RIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGU
ILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTR
IPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUILTTRIPGUI
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!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Long story short:
It's MY fault that I was told the wrong information, because I shoul've been a PARANOID little fucker and verified every stray mote of FUCKING DUST with the BIG BOSS, so now they're going to make an EXAMPLE out of Your Favorite FUCKING CRAZY Stoney.

GOOD NEWS:
I'm not fired!

BAD NEWS:
I'm not on midnights anymore, I'm on second shift! I have to work...
...<b>WITH PEOPLE</b>

GOOD NEWS:
My two-day weekend just turned into a FIVE day weekend.

BAD NEWS:
It's because I'm suspended for three days.

GOOD NEWS:
At least the rat-bastard had the decency to give me my GODS DAMNED PAYCHECK.

MY FRIENDS, I think it's about time I wisened up with my time usage. I THINK... it's time to write a fucking resume. I have three extra days to waste on torrents of stupid, face-stabbingly CRACKEd creativity. Maybe I can fit a little ego-pumping advertisement in there. This job is going to ditch my sorry ass real soon anyway.

Y'know, it's funny, I haven't felt this surreal since when I was traversing the 500 miles that were seperating me from my old home, and my current place of residence. This feeling of randomness, therefore, may be painfully sorely associated with good fortune. I'm going to milk this buzz for all it's worth. bwahah.