I miss you Sharen!!!!!!

So, Sharen's pissed at me, cause I've been getting on, but not commenting on her stuff.... or many peoples for that matter. And I feel like shit for it. I love her. I love her so much. But I can't look comment while on a PSP, cause I have limited type on it. And I can't get a job, (The job I was trying to get as a janitor refused to hire me, no experience) so I feel worse cause I can't help her. I don't get any respect at home, and it's just getting worse. Now my heart aches and I feel sick cause all I can think is that I'm going to lose Sharen.... and if I do...... I don't know..... I just don't want to. But if she wants to, I can't stop her. It's her choice. And I don't want to hurt her.... though I think I already did by not messaging as much as I want to....*Slams head into brother's computer desk* I am such a fucking dick! God! I don't want to be that. I want to be her everything. I want to be her stars, her world. And I can't even get a hold of a computer to talk to her!? FUCK!!!!!!!!!

Maybe I'm overreacting..... maybe she's just worried, and my PSP faving something I didn't want to fave made her think I don't care anymore, and I just have to remind her that she's my every breath...... I don't know. I'm just a nuerotic mess right now.

I almost lost a close friend, another friend is so down he made a suicide threat.... I've been blowing up on people.... my value in my house is less than shit....... I'm just not in the best place right now. I'm worring about everything, including Sharen, which makes her being upset so painful.

Things will look up! They have to. Sharen will realize I miss her and love her and things will be right. I will get a job and move out of my house and talk to Sharen and Karen and things will be good......



I hope......


Missing everyone, especially Sharen,
Carmelo Ocasio III