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I Feel like crying
12 years ago
-sighs- i dont usualy do this but here goes in the past few years id say five or so i havent had the easyest time of life five years ago i was put on homebound beacuse my heart problem ive had from birth well beacuse of that i missed my senior year in highschool looseing touch with almost ALL of my freinds well i turned to online freinds wich was ok for awhile once my heart got better i enrolled in collage well my REajustment to reality wasnt plesent i had a string of emotional brakedowns all in secret around everyone else i was happy healthy and "normal" well after about 4 months into my first simester my heart failed agian WELLL then i found a site called WHOOKOS i loved it there were fun intelegent people there ones who rped and had fun doing it as a group afew years pased and my Three year running RP Dark VS Light stoped the three remaining RPERS myself deadhand69 and eldest wolf keeping in touch well during that three year pieriod i met my mate lost the rest of my IRL freinds and almost died agian more emotional brakedowns more hideing my emotions to stay strong well time skip to tonight i discoverd the site i had networked over 900 freinds all ofwich i talked to was deleted -sighs- i need someone to talk to
The advantage of having online friends verses real life friends, is ironically, people are more honest... and your friendships tend to feel more real, and true. And had I not been pushed and abused the way I did, i would never have developed the sense of strength and humility I have today. I can defend myself and I can stand up for myself because the sad truth is that tragedy and failures are learning experiences.
Another good thing I learned is dropping out of high school, I was able to realize that it wasn't as bad as I had previously thought. I took for granted the positions I was in and that's a mistake I will never make again... if ever given the opportunity.
The toughest lesson I probably learned though is that you can't trust everybody... not everybody is going to stand by your side through the storms of change. And there are those who would like to be by you, but they disappear along the way (die or you lose contact, or something), but you have to live in the moment so to speak.