Can I survive? Do I want to? I’m at odds with the world. All the cruelty, all the limitations. The petty judgments of society, the bindings keeping us within the bounds of even reality itself. Loss, death, everything. And in the middle of it all, crucial parts of who I am will leave me hated by the world. I can’t stand to hide. It hurts. Fine, I don’t need to be universally accepted, though I hate running into shit. But I don’t want to be hunted down.

I don’t know if things will stay safe anywhere. They’re not safe here, for me. Not in most of the world. And even if they were, there’s still so much wrong. So much I cannot accept that others will defend, or otherwise are near impossible to change. If not completely impossible.

I hate society. I hate the world. I hate all of the cruelty and death and bindings and everything that goes on. I care for individuals, but in collectives I just see wrongness and evil. Everything is wrong. I cannot accept it.

And I don’t think I’m strong enough to face the world. I’m weak. And I’m probably going to constantly be hurt through my entire life. Seeing those close to me wounded, clinging to what hurts them, being swallowed up by the great dark masses of collective cruelty. Maybe all of us will vanish.

I wish the rest would too.