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What happened to my gallery...
12 years ago
Since there were more people now who asked me for the reasons I deleted my artwork I'm writing this journal. It would be much easier for me to explain everything in German, but I'll try my best doing it in English. I hope you can follow me and understand.
To begin with, I had lost nearly all of my interest in drawing. The only thing that kept me creating new stuff was the expectation to become more popular or simply to become as good as another artist. In other words, I only drew for the sake of other people, not for myself. In order to be known by more people I only drew commissions, art trades, fanart and even gifts, because these pictures would probably get spread on other websites. What I actually loved about drawing, the ability to express my feelings and to give my imaginary world more reality through bringing it to paper, experimenting with new materials,..., has taken a back seat. Anyways, I didn't achieve what I wanted, I was impatient and so there was a new disappointment every time I uploaded something. I didn't get as much comments or favorites as I was expecting.
The next thing that bugged me that unwritten law saying that no one may ever say anything against a popular person and/or their art. There are some artists out there who's drawing style I really like but their selfish personality pisses me off. I once wrote a comment saying that I don't like the theme of the picture and suddenly a whole bunch of fans was after me, insulting me because of my opinion. And I can't really do anything against it, because I don't have a big circle of that kind of "fans" or "friends".
The reason why I stocked my pictures on deviantart was was the one that I just mentioned plus the incompetence of the current staff members. Their reporting system is so fucked up. And especially in the Lion King fandom nearly all of the new posts are traced bases from the movie. In my opinion these have nothing to do with art anymore and over all, it's a copyright violation. Fortunately it's not as bad here on FA. I still use my DA account to watch people, so you can contact me there, too.
And what comes last, I was and I am afraid of posting personal art with my fursona. I didn't want certain people to see how I am, because a lot of the pictures would have shown me feeling everything else than fine. I've already been bullied after I've uploaded such things. -.- That brings me to the reason why I appeared again here asking for commissions. I'm studying at university now, my father funds me, but the money is tight now. My grandmother moved to the retirement home because of Alzheimer's. My mother's home is barely heated because of the increasing price of fuel oil. And I often go to bed hungry because I want to safe as much money I can for the psychotherapy I really need more frequently. Actually I had planned to stay away from art communities until at least next summer and only draw private stuff, but well... things came different.
My commission slots are currently all taken, but what you can do to help me, if you want to, is commenting my stuff, contact me and do some small talk,... just that I feel less ignored and overseen. I hate that feeling... :(
That's all I have to say so far. If you still have questions, you know what to do, I don't bite. ;)
~Nyashia
To begin with, I had lost nearly all of my interest in drawing. The only thing that kept me creating new stuff was the expectation to become more popular or simply to become as good as another artist. In other words, I only drew for the sake of other people, not for myself. In order to be known by more people I only drew commissions, art trades, fanart and even gifts, because these pictures would probably get spread on other websites. What I actually loved about drawing, the ability to express my feelings and to give my imaginary world more reality through bringing it to paper, experimenting with new materials,..., has taken a back seat. Anyways, I didn't achieve what I wanted, I was impatient and so there was a new disappointment every time I uploaded something. I didn't get as much comments or favorites as I was expecting.
The next thing that bugged me that unwritten law saying that no one may ever say anything against a popular person and/or their art. There are some artists out there who's drawing style I really like but their selfish personality pisses me off. I once wrote a comment saying that I don't like the theme of the picture and suddenly a whole bunch of fans was after me, insulting me because of my opinion. And I can't really do anything against it, because I don't have a big circle of that kind of "fans" or "friends".
The reason why I stocked my pictures on deviantart was was the one that I just mentioned plus the incompetence of the current staff members. Their reporting system is so fucked up. And especially in the Lion King fandom nearly all of the new posts are traced bases from the movie. In my opinion these have nothing to do with art anymore and over all, it's a copyright violation. Fortunately it's not as bad here on FA. I still use my DA account to watch people, so you can contact me there, too.
And what comes last, I was and I am afraid of posting personal art with my fursona. I didn't want certain people to see how I am, because a lot of the pictures would have shown me feeling everything else than fine. I've already been bullied after I've uploaded such things. -.- That brings me to the reason why I appeared again here asking for commissions. I'm studying at university now, my father funds me, but the money is tight now. My grandmother moved to the retirement home because of Alzheimer's. My mother's home is barely heated because of the increasing price of fuel oil. And I often go to bed hungry because I want to safe as much money I can for the psychotherapy I really need more frequently. Actually I had planned to stay away from art communities until at least next summer and only draw private stuff, but well... things came different.
My commission slots are currently all taken, but what you can do to help me, if you want to, is commenting my stuff, contact me and do some small talk,... just that I feel less ignored and overseen. I hate that feeling... :(
That's all I have to say so far. If you still have questions, you know what to do, I don't bite. ;)
~Nyashia
Und ausserdem fand ich deine Zeichnungen immer schon echt cool. Manchmal ziemlich gewagt, und so, aeh ... ja, aber das ist natuerlich alles eine Frage von ... ist ja auch egal, jedenfalls war ich ja immer schon so direkt eher zurueckhaltend und so.
Hey, ich hoffe du feierst richtig Ostern! =^_^= Oder zumindest ein bischen? Ich werd' in Zukunft auch deine Bilder mal kommentieren! Das eine da in der Gallerie schaut aus wie Tacimur, vielleicht ist es Zufall oder es ist sie, muss ich spaeter nochmal alles in Ruhe anschauen :). Selbst wenn du von Art communities eine Auszeit nehmen solltest, schreib' ruhig wie es dir geht, oder so, halte Kontakt, dass man sich nicht so oft aus dem Blick geraet.
Liebe Ostergruesse!!! :)
Mit der Savanne ist das so eine Sache... Es war mal mein Zuhause, meine Familie im Internet. Aber jetzt habe ich das Gefühl, dass kein Platz mehr für mich da ist. Sicher würden sich ein paar Leute freuen, wenn ich wiederkäme und mich würde auch niemand absichtlich ausstoßen, aber es gibt gewisse Leute da, mit denen ich nichts mehr zu tun haben will. Jedes Mal wenn ich deren Namen lese oder das, was sie schreiben, gibt es mir so einen Stich in die Brust. Zum Glück gibt es aber außerhalb des Forums auch ein wenig Kontakt. Im April treffe ich mich voraussichtlich mit Kanu.
Und ja, den Headshot habe ich für Taci gemacht. ^^
If you ever want to talk about stuff feel free to send me a note. I being through 10 years of depression and ill health but have come through it, theres always people out there can share things with don't feel like few people care
"What I actually loved about drawing, the ability to express my feelings and to give my imaginary world more reality through bringing it to paper, experimenting with new materials,..."
You might not be popular (depending on who you ask), but your art is still great and there are people appreciating it.
Keep going! :)
so yeah, just ignore them and let it go, it's just best that way. post your art and be proud of it. don't keep trying to make it a competition, just try to be happy with your rather obvious and evolving talents! you do great work!
ANd I apologize for not helping out with the comments and the likes. I've fallen /years/ behind in my submission inbox and haven't been able to see a lot of what people are posting these days sadly. one day I'll get through it all. And I hope that when that day comes, your gallery will be filled again with wonderful things for me to comment on ^^
Wenn du ab und zu tatsächlich Smalltalk von fremden Wölfen brauchst, ich hab meistens Zeit. Wenn es also gewünscht ist und dir tatsächlich hilft jedenfalls. Halt die Ohren steif.
Ersteinmal will ich sagen, das die Welt da draussen voller Deppen ist und ich weiss selbst wie schwer es sein kann sich da ein dickes Fell zuzulegen, aber solche Leute musst du einfach ignorieren lernen!
Das was ich bisher von deinen Zeichnungen sehen konnte ist nicht nur "sehr gut", sondern richtig, richtig klasse!
Mach weiter so und lass dich nicht unterbuttern, dann kommt das mit dem Bekanntheitsgrad von alleine.
Ferals and pretty neat things are my thing~ :D Anywho, dont feel like you have owe people to get known around here. I felt like that for the longest. If you feel your art isnt worth anything, its gonna be a long drag to the end. Draw for yourself and for fun. Those that care, matter. The ones that matter, dont care~ if you're popular or not~