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About friends before I move.
17 years ago
General
You know, one thing that gets me is how things like the pic I posted here tends to really show who your friends are.
Some friends got mad and left. I knew it was going to happen. A couple I knew would do it and a couple I didn't think would did. While a couple I thought would jump ship didn't.
I was talking with another good friend about friendship, people bailing on me because I don't like foxy boxing and if I could I'd wage all out war against it. (Especially since how some of the characters I have mentioned in the past have reached a NEW LOW of sickness!!)
People say they're my friends but they do not offer to help with things I need help with. They take a stance of "We'll cheer you on. I won't lift a finger to help you." while I reached out to them. The cheering is great, honestly, and the hope and prayer is fine. However, if a cripple is knocked off of his wheelchair and isn't strong enough to right themself... what would you do?
I know you're all not going to start praying for God to come down to the Earth, pick the guy up, put him in his chair, and everything would be fine. I know nobody would stand there saying "You can do it! You can get on there! I won't help you! But I'll be sure to give you all the vocal support I can!", no.
What would you do? If he's reaching out to you for help you'd take a moment to stick your hand out, pull him up, and put him in his chair. Feels good, doesn't it? Maybe instead of being the prayer doer YOU are the hand that God wants to pick the guy up? A couple of my friends know this.
What I needed help with was something most people couldn't do. It would take a lot longer than a moment. Still, I found myself surrounded by all this vocal support, then silence. Is it really love at all if the only love is hard nosed tough love?
Being a friend is more than telling them you have faith in them, and telling them you think they're wrong. What could have helped keep me from getting so bitter and mean is if people would have done friendly things. Things I have often done for them. Things many of them I HAVE done things for. Since so many of my friends have a "Because I can do it you can to" let me throw that right back in your face and watch as you don't do it.
If you see something cool that you think I'd like... show me. If something happens to you that may make me laugh, tell me. If you need help with something that I may know the answer to, ask me. Just don't stand there and say "Yer wrong. You have a completely wrong attitude." and think you're being the best possible friend there is. Positive things is what friends do for each other. Make friends smile. Help them through a tragedy. If they need you to hold their hand through rough times then for FUCKS SAKE BE A FRIEND AND DO IT! I would have for any one of those guys. I have for some of those guys. [edit] And I will do it for friends still. I held a certain silver pandas hand through hard times when he was down on himself and his art. Then when I was crying out for help... he spit in my hand and walked away. That isn't a friend.
You want to bust my balls, fuck you. You've been busting them all along and you no longer have the right to bust them any more.
I'm moving, and I'll be without net for a while. Good luck to the good people, and may the fleas of a million HIV infected camels infest the pubic hairs of the bad people.
Some friends got mad and left. I knew it was going to happen. A couple I knew would do it and a couple I didn't think would did. While a couple I thought would jump ship didn't.
I was talking with another good friend about friendship, people bailing on me because I don't like foxy boxing and if I could I'd wage all out war against it. (Especially since how some of the characters I have mentioned in the past have reached a NEW LOW of sickness!!)
People say they're my friends but they do not offer to help with things I need help with. They take a stance of "We'll cheer you on. I won't lift a finger to help you." while I reached out to them. The cheering is great, honestly, and the hope and prayer is fine. However, if a cripple is knocked off of his wheelchair and isn't strong enough to right themself... what would you do?
I know you're all not going to start praying for God to come down to the Earth, pick the guy up, put him in his chair, and everything would be fine. I know nobody would stand there saying "You can do it! You can get on there! I won't help you! But I'll be sure to give you all the vocal support I can!", no.
What would you do? If he's reaching out to you for help you'd take a moment to stick your hand out, pull him up, and put him in his chair. Feels good, doesn't it? Maybe instead of being the prayer doer YOU are the hand that God wants to pick the guy up? A couple of my friends know this.
What I needed help with was something most people couldn't do. It would take a lot longer than a moment. Still, I found myself surrounded by all this vocal support, then silence. Is it really love at all if the only love is hard nosed tough love?
Being a friend is more than telling them you have faith in them, and telling them you think they're wrong. What could have helped keep me from getting so bitter and mean is if people would have done friendly things. Things I have often done for them. Things many of them I HAVE done things for. Since so many of my friends have a "Because I can do it you can to" let me throw that right back in your face and watch as you don't do it.
If you see something cool that you think I'd like... show me. If something happens to you that may make me laugh, tell me. If you need help with something that I may know the answer to, ask me. Just don't stand there and say "Yer wrong. You have a completely wrong attitude." and think you're being the best possible friend there is. Positive things is what friends do for each other. Make friends smile. Help them through a tragedy. If they need you to hold their hand through rough times then for FUCKS SAKE BE A FRIEND AND DO IT! I would have for any one of those guys. I have for some of those guys. [edit] And I will do it for friends still. I held a certain silver pandas hand through hard times when he was down on himself and his art. Then when I was crying out for help... he spit in my hand and walked away. That isn't a friend.
You want to bust my balls, fuck you. You've been busting them all along and you no longer have the right to bust them any more.
I'm moving, and I'll be without net for a while. Good luck to the good people, and may the fleas of a million HIV infected camels infest the pubic hairs of the bad people.
Don't you mean because you don't have any balls anymore?
Fine then, I'll just take this as the evidence proving that you are beyond my help. Thanks for the pain, Rich.
When it comes to a few folks, you being one of them, when i see the name I gear for a fight. I just don't have the teeth anymore. Remember when we were close? You'd show me your stories, I'd show you mine. I'd commission you and you'd do a pic for me. The long waits for the commissions were fine because we were in contact, and we had some fun.
Then I broke.
Ever since then it feels like you've been punishing me for breaking. Like my sadness is such an insult to you that I deserve to be beaten down on. Like your interest isn't in helping me but in making me pay for going soft. That in your mind I deserve to suffer.
Because I've cared so much about you as a friend for so long I was afraid to metaphorically stick a Coke bottle up your ass and break it off at the neck and brag about how I busted a cap in your ass.
Karno, Mitch Marmmel, Lone Wolverine, Aelius, Bandit Ringtail, Leannebluefire, Namerepus gave me happy things once in a while. They tried to bring a smile to my face, not beat one out of me. "Here, check this out!" and "Dude, you won't believe what happened today!" they made me feel welcome to be a part of their lives. So while I'm not talkitive by any stretch I keep in contact with them.
I wish we could go back to sharing fun things. I'd love to see more pics from you. I'd love to read more of your stories, someday. But until I don't have to worry about you playing hackey sack with my nuts over depression and shit then we can't communicate. We can't communicate, there's no friendship going. I've been right here. All it would have taken was some sign of "Lets have some fun, bro." but now there is some proving to be done. That ball is in your court, and I don't think you're interested enough.
You could have given me a hand just by being a bright spot in life. Not just another angry voice beating down on me.