I feel completely confused, and I realize what kind of weirdo I must seem to be towards other people. Perhaps I overstep boundaries, or perhaps I'm just not a social enough person to really grasp a concept of how to act? Considering I've spent most of my life as the quiet, timid type who saw being intellectual better then being incredibly burly or manly like a dudebro or a jock has made me more reclusive. I also seen to notice how truthful it is that despite how much I try to be wise, it usually ends with frustration and failure. Considering I've made choices in my life which have put me where I am now, it leaves me to realize I could have done so much better, and that I wasted so much energy and time doing the stupidest of things. Then again, looking back, I don't seem them as stupid. Is spending time with the people you care about and love, your friends you'd rather spend time with actually enjoying life better then spending my time wasting away in a building for 8 hours attempting to grasp something that I'd never use in my life really worth it? Was it really important? When I think about everything, it brings back both good and bad memories. Sometimes I wish I could correct the mistakes in my life, but I realize that they've taught me a good deal. In the end, I suppose it's shown me that life is what you make it, and that it'll teach you all kinds of lessons that will leave you either happy and content, or reeling with pain and grief. One of the lessons I was taught growing up was to never judge without understanding. In order to understand what it is you're judging, it's best to look at every angle before deciding for yourself.

I suppose in my current mindset, there are a few people I'd like to apologize to... And I'm sure that if they're reading this, they know who they are... I feel so stupid. Causing Pain or discomfort is the last thing I'd ever want for anyone... I'm the kind of person who'd rather suffer then let others suffer. Of course, this is just a rant, and I don't know any better. In any case, those who read this, thank you for your time and patience...