Well, crap.

Did anyone there actually know about it yet or was it still hidden from everybody?

All of my friends know .

I'm sorry. I really don't know what to say that'd be of any help.

I know... But you guys just being here helps enough. So thank you for that.

You NEED to preemptively sit down and explain it to your dad. Of he loves you he will understand. MAKE him know you were born this way and it's who you are. Ideally you should come clean with your whole family. There is NOTHING wrong with being honest with who you truly are. Be strong and stand your ground.

I wanted to do all of that...but mot like this...I wanted to have everything planned out and come out on my terms but this...this isn't what i wanted. I will try...thank you thouhg.

you can do this. stay strong.

Thank you.

And I haven't forgotten about your commission. I've just been busy. I'm sorry....It will get done I swear.

Take care of YOURSELF. first.

I AGREE 100%!!!

And he is 100000% right. So I cannot help but and agree with him. :3

I want to say thank you so much for understanding and I'm trying.
Everything seems...normal now. Which is odd. He hasn't brought it up and is kind of acting like nothing happened. I still have my guard up waiting for him to kick me out of the house or something. But I don't know. For now I'm not oging to worry about it and deal with whatever is tossed my way.

Oh god...I'm so sorry Kaiden. If you ever need anything you can definitely text Ben or you can even text me if you want my number. I hope all goes well =/

Thank you...Yeah I was texting Ben last night after you guys read this journal... I'm still a little shaken about the whole thing. And if you want my number just steal it from Ben. That's cool.

I'm just...he wouldn't even look at me last night...

Alright :x

And seriously?? Damn....I can relate to you. My Dad thought it'd be ok to tell my grandma that Ben and I were dating (She's really religious and HATES "gay" people) and all she does now is glare at Ben and makes me feel bad.

Yeah...everythings better now he's kind of acting like nothing happened. Which I guess is better than kicking me out of the house or anything. I'm on my guard tho in case it does happen I'm not taken completely off guard.

And I'm sorry to hear that. :/ But older people don't know how to take in the new generation that is overly accepting.

At least things are a bit better for you.


Yeah....it's cool. Something must of happened because she's been super nice the past couple days. Nicer than usual.

...that is odd.... Just don't put your guard down... Don't want her doing something when your least expect it, ya know? But maybe she has had a change of heart and is starting to change her ways of thinking?

Maybe? Lol I have no idea...she's back to being grumpy though. So...I have NO idea what the heck that was all about. How are you doing?

Huh I wonder what that was then. Maybe she found herself a little fun and it helped her loosen up and chill for like a day. Aha
And I'm doing alright, thanks for asking, everything seems to be back to normal at the moment. I'm not putting my guard down though on the off chance that changes.

I'm glad things are a little better, but yeah good idea. I'm not putting my guard down either.

I hope that everything works out though. And everything gets better though and your grandma relaxes.

Well your dad seems upset by it but maybe pretending nothing happened is his way of dealing with it. Refusing to acknowledge it even exists. You will have to straight up talk to him about it eventually but if he's not bringing it up then there's plenty of time to plan for that and you should just relax for now. When that time comes be surety prepare lots of reading material from a legitimate subject for him to read so he doesn't try that, "it's all in your head. It's nonsense..." bull$hit... :-\

*a legitimate source on the subject

You're right. Even if he's just pretending its not there is better than being thrown out and everything. And that's what I wanted to do in the first place I wanted to have a nice thing planned out. I'm going to have to start working on it sooner rather than later.

You can do it. Just be honest. Let them know that it's who you are...and if they cannot accept that...than they are rejecting their own child. Which I HIGHLY doubt they would ever do. Best of luck. You'll do just fine.

I never thought of it that way. I've always set myself up for being rejected just because that is the worst case scenario and I wanted to have a back up place to stay/live if it truly was to come to such a thing. I just would really want them to understand and have a firm grasp on what "transgender" means. Many people get it confused with transvestites or intersex. Which I understand, in a way, they're all not topics that most "normal" people understand and look up on a daily bases. Which is part of the reason I don't think that my father really understood what I meant when he happened to read those messages with me saying that I was saving up and such things.
I have plenty of material that I want to lay out for them and really give both my parents something that will at least make them understand the word first before they could even try and accept me.

I completely AGREE. Education is KEY. There's plenty of books written by credible phychiatrists and such that break it down simply. Hell there's even pamphlets for parents! Just start searching online. There's tons of help sites and such. You're far from alone. :)

Exactly! And the school that I'm going to has a HUGE GSA club and they deal a lot of with Transgenders there, I was hoping to be able to befriend someone up there and have help me out with a good solid plan on what to do. And I'm sure that they would have a nice pamphlet for my parents, ya know?
And thanks for taking the time to talk to me and let me vent a little and just get my thoughts out and such and all of the advice. It really means a lot : ]

If I can do ANYTHING to help souls as kind as you I will without any hesitation. ;3

I truly believe that there needs to be more people (or birds :3) like you in the world. : ]

Thank you. That means a lot to me. :)

I am glad : ] You're very welcome and you should hear it a lot because it is so true. You're incredibly nice and just the world would be better with more people like you seriously. I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it.

Glad you think so. My life has been pretty horrid regardless... learning to appreciate the blessings I do have though. ^_^

I do think so~ And I understand. It's hard to see the light at the other end of the tunnel some days but its all about finding what works for you and seeing what others see in you (I've been going through it myself trying to accept myself for who I am and understand that people aren't telling me stuff to bullshit me and actually mean it. The good stuff anyway. Everything else comes with the time and I'll deal with it when it comes to me). ~

you summed it up very well. Amen. :)

Good :D