So it seems that no matter what I do, I'm not enough to make anyone happy in life. I can wait on hand and knee, to do everything for them, I can be everything they want, but it's never enough. All I am, is some person to fill in a hole until someone better comes along. That's all I've ever been to all but one person that I know for a fact.

In short, don't know where my current relationship is going, even though things had been great between us until just 2 weeks ago. I was hoping it was just some little thing, but now she's just taking everything out on me. Avoiding me, not even sleeping in the same bed as me. I cook and clean for her, I make sure to do everything so all she has to do is relax and enjoy herself, nothing more.

To top this all off, I'm also dealing with issues finding work still, someone who helped me before doesn't want to talk to me anymore even though I kept trying to keep in contact but he removed me twice on skype, fucking awesome person there. My book sales are still in the shitter to add to it all as well.

In short I find myself to be a disappointment to everyone I come in contact with, and never seem to be able to do enough for anyone.