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I'm just going to vent on you guys if that's okay?
12 years ago
[b] Trades~
Spirit: Boxed up saving money on shipment
Armagare: Hold.
Spirit: Boxed up saving money on shipment
Armagare: Hold.
I am just falling apart, I'm sorry if it seems like I'm just a stupid teenager who needs to get over themselves, but everything is happening at once, and I have no place to go. No one to turn to.
About everything I complain or whine about just my stressful anger, and shit.
I'm sorry you guys have to put up with me/
Not long ago (few weeks) I lost some friends, and they were my everything.
I cried myself to sleep thinking that I would be alone in this place/ which I am.
I turned to my mom, she said they would come back, but I knew they weren't
going to come. My friend's and their parents want no part of me what so ever.
I told them I was sorry, and it was okay for them not to accept it because my actions were dumb as hell.
A week passes
One of my buddy's massaged me saying that she was on their side.
I began to have an anxiety attack, and I was also paranoid of one of them
beating me up (they were threatening me) I came so close to suicidal thoughts.
I thought about it over, and over. I knew I couldn't do it because I'm a coward when it comes to death.
another few weeks go by.
My other friend (who is pretty close to where I live) Told me she was in a car crash
I began to have those thoughts again. She said she thought she was going to die, and I tried to calm her down the best I could because she was hyperventilating I didn't want her to die from smoke in her lungs.
I'm just so torn.
I'm sorry if I seem to be a sad butt munch.
About everything I complain or whine about just my stressful anger, and shit.
I'm sorry you guys have to put up with me/
Not long ago (few weeks) I lost some friends, and they were my everything.
I cried myself to sleep thinking that I would be alone in this place/ which I am.
I turned to my mom, she said they would come back, but I knew they weren't
going to come. My friend's and their parents want no part of me what so ever.
I told them I was sorry, and it was okay for them not to accept it because my actions were dumb as hell.
A week passes
One of my buddy's massaged me saying that she was on their side.
I began to have an anxiety attack, and I was also paranoid of one of them
beating me up (they were threatening me) I came so close to suicidal thoughts.
I thought about it over, and over. I knew I couldn't do it because I'm a coward when it comes to death.
another few weeks go by.
My other friend (who is pretty close to where I live) Told me she was in a car crash
I began to have those thoughts again. She said she thought she was going to die, and I tried to calm her down the best I could because she was hyperventilating I didn't want her to die from smoke in her lungs.
I'm just so torn.
I'm sorry if I seem to be a sad butt munch.
call me or meet up on skype
I have no cam/mic anymore, but we could chat in the chat box.
Sorry about all the shit you're going through. I've been on the outside of a lot of friendships, so I really do know how you feel :/ I just wish I had something better to say.
I just want you to know that you do matter, and you are important. I know we don't talk much, and I need to fix that. You don't ever need to feel alone, because I'll always be here. I've been around the block a few times, and I am always willing to talk to anyone about their problems, if you ever want to.
What you said just made me feel a bit more secure, and I think I'll shoot you up a note, because I have a lot to get off of my chest. You have always been a really good friend Jay, and I think you are the person that I feel most comfortable to talk too right now.
I can understand how you feel and if you need a buddy to talk to or some advise. hit me up.