Pretty much everything is bullshit right now. We had moved recently, me and my mom, along with her boyfriend. I thought it would be nice, I thought it would be fun, I thought I might actually be more comfortable there.

I couldn't be more wrong.,,

Things have been so bad lately, though I'm usually never in the middle of it. It's ridiculous. My mom and her boyfriend have been fighting a lot. It's been utter shit honestly. I barely ever see my mom cry, and it seems she has been doing it a lot lately, because of that asshole she is dating. I'm getting tired of him yelling at her, it isn't fair. Especially when they do it right outside my window, as if I can't hear them. I don't like him, and I don't like talking to him. I mean before i was just shy and quiet, which to him is rude and 'not normal', as if social anxiety is a quick fix problem. Now I just don't want to talk to him.

What I hate the most is that I feel like it's my fault. I just feel like everything was fine before we moved in together, and now it just feels like I'm the problem. I sort of just wish I could just leave forever and let everyone be happy not ever having to see me again. So what if they miss me for awhile? They will get over it and realize how much better everything it without me and be glad I am gone. I just want to leave, so they don't have to deal with me but I can't. I'm just the burden on everyone's life. I just feel like every personal problem that happens to my mother is because of me. I can't help the way I am, maybe it would be best if I just left. I don't know what to do...

Why does it feel like everyone who gets to really know me just end up hating what they see... I just want them to be happy... And as long as I'm around, no one can be...