*tacklepounces you*

I am in a hard case, wrapped in leather, and the center of your universe. What am I?

Hmm... A holstered pistol? A bullet?

Nope

I give up... what?

Your mind. :3

Clever.

The queen of all the potatoes is tucking her baby princess potatoes into bed. As she tucks the first princess potato in she asks her, "So who are you going to marry when you grow up?"

The princess potato answers, "I'm going to marry King Edward!"

And the potato queen says, "That's a very good choice!" She moves on and tucks the second potato princess into bed and as she does, asks, "And who are you going to marry?"

"I'm going to marry one of the Jersey Royals!"

The queen potato smiles and says, "That's another good choice." And she tucks the third princess potato into bed and asks, "And who are you going to marry when you grow up?"

The princess looks her straight in the eyes and says, "I'm going to marry John Virgo!"

(Read the queen's answer in a cockney accent) The queen looks disgustedly at her and says, "You can't marry him, he's just a common 'tater!"

You're welcome!

I AM AMUSED.