I tried to illustrate this feeling, but it didn't go out well, so fuck it.

you know how trans/furs/etc. feel like they're a different gender/species/thing in their body, like they have the wrong soul? I've been thinking about myself in real life versus what I want to be, and what I feel like I am. The submissive, feminine persona feels like me, but not so. It feels like they share the body with me, and influence some things, but as i go through life, and it becomes more inconvenient to be that person, that they just fade away. I just don't feel like them lately at all, even alone when it would be alright to indulge in that, it just feels pointless. in social contact, if that side is brought up by others, I usually deny or repress it.

Ugh. i can't really organize this at all. I don't know what I am. There you go, have a good day.