It's doing that shit again where it'll turn on and off, and I've isolated the problem: there's something wrong with the usb port inside it. Like, it won't detect it unless I push on it in a very specific way. And there's no way to do that unless it's taken apart, or I'm very lucky when I plug it in. It's doing it worse than it was a while ago so I'm not going to hope it sorts itself out like last time.

So, everything's gonna be put on hold for a little while until I can get a new one.
If anyone's curious or has experience with one of these and wants to tell me how they are, here's the one I'm gonna get:

Intuos Pen & Touch
http://www.wacom.com/us/en/creative/intuos-s

Apparently, they don't make Bamboo tablets anymore and those are their replacement.