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Furry Children
12 years ago
Ok, so, I just got done writing a long letter to another fur who is feeling down, and I was trying (kinda pathetically) to cheer up.
And I just kind of felt it was worth sharing, at least here, vs. on a place like facebook. Here, those that do know me personally enough to know which son, etc I am talking about know my family enough I do not feel bad about them knowing the details, etc. But names and such are removed for privacy.
I just wanted to share this on here for 2 reasons. I HAVE been given a hard time for allowing my kids to be in the fandom by SOME furs, this hopefully explains SOME of it. Also, if you are ever wondering if you contribute anything as a fursuiter, or furry, this is a mom's perspective of how just simply being you can have a profound affect on a child, in the right place, at the right time.
Sorry the letter is loooooong, and I edited it here to help a little bit:
I was hoping to try and make you feel (a bit) better with some insight, and thoughts.
Ok, like I had kinda said before, our family went fur (well, for me it was just finding a name for it), and as far as my son's go they are dipping their toes in the water so to speak. My husband, who before going to Megaplex this year was just an innocent bystander until having such a great time at the con he wants to become a fursuiter too. I am aware that there are furs that are against any kids in the fandom, I have had to deal with things from name calling to backstabbing, etc. And I know there are some that just think it is weird. I *kinda* get that you might be in one of those groups of mind sets, but I don't know you, so who am I to judge? In any case, I don't disagree that on the surface it may be a little odd, but what in the fandom isn't?! And as long as someone doesn't disrespect me or my family then everyone is absolutely entitled to their opinion.
My kids, they don't know anything about there being furs who don't think they belong, they don't know about the various dramas that can be found in the fandom, they don't know anything about the mature artwork or animation, no clue about any of the mature stuff, room parties, raves. So what is left is (safe) artwork, stories, animations, they know about creativity and imagination, and they know about their purely positive experience at a con.
As cheesy as it sounds, what they know about fursuiting is where animals of various species all get along and accept one another. I made them, at their request, partial fursuits. They got to use their imaginations and make up their own animal, how they wanted it to be. And then, they got to play! And they weren't the only kids on top of that. They got to be a part of a group with so many age ranges, so many different species, hybrids, and everyone was having FUN. We go to fur meets, where everyone is friends and treat them as equals. Our family started a furry bowling league that gets together once a month. Quite a few show up, it grows a little each time.
It's not much, but if you haven't seen this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CPHtextqXFE . From 8:23-12:16, This was their favorite part of the Megaplex con, right after the fursuit parade just a few of us hung out, the kids got to play with a camera, and we were all just chatting. It's these random moments that are so amazing.
I am so sorry for rambling, I wanted to give you a little perspective for what I want to tell you about. What follows is what I am trying to get at.
It's the random moments, like meeting you. I honestly have no clue what you did differently than any of the other furries that night we met. What you did special. If anything. That made my son think you were the BEST, and made him drawn to you. Maybe you have no idea either? But maybe that is the beauty of it. You were just being YOU.
I want to tell you a bit about XXXXX.
XXXXX is 12, he is in middle school (7th grade). He is gifted, as well as ADHD. So, different, but not so different. People hear gifted though and all they think about is super smart kid. They don't realize that gifted children also deal with a whole lot of social problems, because they just don't think or act the same as their peers. And XXXXX is very socially awkward. He has been bullied since 2nd grade. It has ranged from name calling (fag, weirdo, gay, crybaby) to physical abuse. In 3rd grade he was thrown to the ground and kicked by 2 of his classmates. Just last month we had to press charges against an 8th grade boy, who sexually ASSAULTED him on the bus. His real life is full of many, many problems that a preteen of his age should just never know.
Ok, why is this important? Because of YOU.
Something about YOU clicked for him. Meeting you, watching your videos, being your fan. Again, with the cheesy wording, but I just can't think of a way to word it without sounding goofy: You opened up a bit of a world for him. That night, and every other time he has got to hang out with other furries, no one calls him names or makes fun of him. And when he dresses up as Buddy, his yellow lab pup, he gets to act however he wants, dance like no one is watching, be silly; and no one judges or makes fun of him. Even with all the other furs there that night, if it wasn't for you I don't think he would be as interested as he was to join in. Sure, since then we have meet and formed quite the furry family of friends, some that have gone so far as to call the boys their little brothers. And he does have other "shelters" from the bullying; he has gymnastics, and the love that it is found at home, fellow bronies, whovians, and the one or two friends he does have at school. But furries definitely play a big part, and he still talks of meeting you again.
I am sorry this letter is so long, I didn't mean for it to be. I am just trying to get it all out so it makes sense.
I felt I have to tell you how deeply POSITIVE you affected my son's life. Not by trying to be a role model, or having the pressure to perform to some standard, or even by doing anything super extraordinary.
Just by being you. Just by being the kind of guy that breathed life in to a 6 foot-something German shepherd who paid attention to, and danced with a boy.
Thank you.
And I just kind of felt it was worth sharing, at least here, vs. on a place like facebook. Here, those that do know me personally enough to know which son, etc I am talking about know my family enough I do not feel bad about them knowing the details, etc. But names and such are removed for privacy.
I just wanted to share this on here for 2 reasons. I HAVE been given a hard time for allowing my kids to be in the fandom by SOME furs, this hopefully explains SOME of it. Also, if you are ever wondering if you contribute anything as a fursuiter, or furry, this is a mom's perspective of how just simply being you can have a profound affect on a child, in the right place, at the right time.
Sorry the letter is loooooong, and I edited it here to help a little bit:
I was hoping to try and make you feel (a bit) better with some insight, and thoughts.
Ok, like I had kinda said before, our family went fur (well, for me it was just finding a name for it), and as far as my son's go they are dipping their toes in the water so to speak. My husband, who before going to Megaplex this year was just an innocent bystander until having such a great time at the con he wants to become a fursuiter too. I am aware that there are furs that are against any kids in the fandom, I have had to deal with things from name calling to backstabbing, etc. And I know there are some that just think it is weird. I *kinda* get that you might be in one of those groups of mind sets, but I don't know you, so who am I to judge? In any case, I don't disagree that on the surface it may be a little odd, but what in the fandom isn't?! And as long as someone doesn't disrespect me or my family then everyone is absolutely entitled to their opinion.
My kids, they don't know anything about there being furs who don't think they belong, they don't know about the various dramas that can be found in the fandom, they don't know anything about the mature artwork or animation, no clue about any of the mature stuff, room parties, raves. So what is left is (safe) artwork, stories, animations, they know about creativity and imagination, and they know about their purely positive experience at a con.
As cheesy as it sounds, what they know about fursuiting is where animals of various species all get along and accept one another. I made them, at their request, partial fursuits. They got to use their imaginations and make up their own animal, how they wanted it to be. And then, they got to play! And they weren't the only kids on top of that. They got to be a part of a group with so many age ranges, so many different species, hybrids, and everyone was having FUN. We go to fur meets, where everyone is friends and treat them as equals. Our family started a furry bowling league that gets together once a month. Quite a few show up, it grows a little each time.
It's not much, but if you haven't seen this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CPHtextqXFE . From 8:23-12:16, This was their favorite part of the Megaplex con, right after the fursuit parade just a few of us hung out, the kids got to play with a camera, and we were all just chatting. It's these random moments that are so amazing.
I am so sorry for rambling, I wanted to give you a little perspective for what I want to tell you about. What follows is what I am trying to get at.
It's the random moments, like meeting you. I honestly have no clue what you did differently than any of the other furries that night we met. What you did special. If anything. That made my son think you were the BEST, and made him drawn to you. Maybe you have no idea either? But maybe that is the beauty of it. You were just being YOU.
I want to tell you a bit about XXXXX.
XXXXX is 12, he is in middle school (7th grade). He is gifted, as well as ADHD. So, different, but not so different. People hear gifted though and all they think about is super smart kid. They don't realize that gifted children also deal with a whole lot of social problems, because they just don't think or act the same as their peers. And XXXXX is very socially awkward. He has been bullied since 2nd grade. It has ranged from name calling (fag, weirdo, gay, crybaby) to physical abuse. In 3rd grade he was thrown to the ground and kicked by 2 of his classmates. Just last month we had to press charges against an 8th grade boy, who sexually ASSAULTED him on the bus. His real life is full of many, many problems that a preteen of his age should just never know.
Ok, why is this important? Because of YOU.
Something about YOU clicked for him. Meeting you, watching your videos, being your fan. Again, with the cheesy wording, but I just can't think of a way to word it without sounding goofy: You opened up a bit of a world for him. That night, and every other time he has got to hang out with other furries, no one calls him names or makes fun of him. And when he dresses up as Buddy, his yellow lab pup, he gets to act however he wants, dance like no one is watching, be silly; and no one judges or makes fun of him. Even with all the other furs there that night, if it wasn't for you I don't think he would be as interested as he was to join in. Sure, since then we have meet and formed quite the furry family of friends, some that have gone so far as to call the boys their little brothers. And he does have other "shelters" from the bullying; he has gymnastics, and the love that it is found at home, fellow bronies, whovians, and the one or two friends he does have at school. But furries definitely play a big part, and he still talks of meeting you again.
I am sorry this letter is so long, I didn't mean for it to be. I am just trying to get it all out so it makes sense.
I felt I have to tell you how deeply POSITIVE you affected my son's life. Not by trying to be a role model, or having the pressure to perform to some standard, or even by doing anything super extraordinary.
Just by being you. Just by being the kind of guy that breathed life in to a 6 foot-something German shepherd who paid attention to, and danced with a boy.
Thank you.
Children also encourage a convention to provide a family tract and discourages some activities that should be held behind closed doors.
If we are to be as inclusive as some claim then we need to be inclusive for all age ranges too.
I am glad they had a fun time and I hope they can make it back for more fun next year! Kids are not only the future of the fandom, but they are the heart and soul of why so many people suit. (Furry and non furry kids alike) And having them there made the entire convention so much more special and fun for everyone!
I wish there were more wonderful parents like you two, and if you should ever need any support or help in any way feel free to let me know!
To tell you the truth...
I too was considered "gifted" student and have severe ADD. The school I went to didn't have a way to handle kids that were operating at a higher level. They ended up sticking me in a classroom with 4 other students all of which had a harder time learning things because then they could give me a more challenging curriculum. Needless to say this got me made fun of and beat up quite often. I found Furry at the age of 11 but never really got to meet anyone in the fandom in person until I was 18. I truly believe that if I had the chance it would have helped me deal with my childhood a lot better than i did.
I am so happy your children were able to find such a great role model in the fandom.
Everytime I am in suit I love seeing the faces of children light up when they see a suiter perform