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Motivation
12 years ago
General
This one's gonna be long and kind of sappy, so buckle up and keep some tissues close.
This entire past week I've had mood swings out the wazoo. Anyone who follows me on Twitter can attest, I've been complaining a whole lot- more than usual, as a matter of fact. But typically my sour moods only last a night and then are gone for a while. This hung around for a lot longer, and last night the reasons why kind of came together.
Lately I've been mulling around a new character idea. Not a replacement for Duino, but someone who'd be like Rainer and just kind of be around for abuse pictures and silliness. Though I was really hesitant to get art, for three big reasons: A) I don't show Rainer enough love as it is and he doesn't need to have even more competition B) The things I wanted to use the new guy for are what Rainer was invented for in the first place and C) This guy was shaping up to be what I wanted in a friend rather than a character of my own, and it felt weird to have something so distant from myself as an OC. Like I was inventing a fictional boyfriend for Duino and MAN I don't want to be that guy.
The reason this dude came up in my thought process to start was because of how much I've rebounded into the mode of "I want to be a cartoon." It's a desire I never stop having, but it's been especially strong lately. And with that mood I've been daydreaming about physical comedy and gags and performing, and eventually came to the grim acceptance that I'm in the worst shape of my life. The reason I've been so depressed lately, and felt so lonely and pathetic, is because I'm in no condition to pursue slapstick, the thing I want to learn more than anything. I want to get good at comic movement and maybe even dancing, and living the way I am now is taking me further away.
I don't know if I've ever told anyone the story of the last time I ever felt truly motivated by something, but it was back in high school when I first joined the fandom. I was seeing pictures of suits all over and was captivated with them. So the next three months of my life and I drove myself hard to exercise every night. And I actually saw some results. I wanted to participate so badly that I felt like doing something for myself, which I'd never really felt before and have rarely felt since.
It came full circle last night when I saw Dingoroo on the Pawpet show. Pawpet typically isn't my bag, but I was told Dingo was premiering his new suit and I wanted to check it out. And seeing him perform brought me back to the excitement I had years ago when I was just starting in the fandom. The energy, the gestures, expressions, it was AMAZING. And what's more, the fact everyone was pointing and calling him a toon- that something I held as a dream was real. That's what I've always wanted. I'm a lot closer than I used to be, but this proved in my head I can actually do it for myself.
I woke up this morning realizing I'd felt so shitty because I'd been stopping myself from pursuing suiting, which has been one of the biggest things I'd like to try since I got into this crazy place. I keep saying I'll get a suit when I make some money and lose some weight, and I don't know what's made me think I can't do either at this point in my life. I've had health kicks and resolutions before, but this time I want it to be different. There's exercise equipment on campus and even a running track that's open at night I can use. I've already started doing stretches and sit-ups in my room and I'll add on more as I limber up. The reason I stopped last time was because I felt like I'd never be accepted by anyone in this community, and thanks to you incredibly patient people, that doubt's long gone. So without that in my way, I think I can do it.
I'll admit, I'm pretty nervous I'll give up again. But I also hope you guys will keep me going and will help remind me to exercise every night. Dieting is historically much harder for me, and while I'm eating less now, I'll tackle a true diet plan once I've made headway with exercising regularly. It's cheesy as hell but there's nothing I want more in life than to be a cartoon, and I owe it to myself to slim down. I've been overweight all my life, and I don't need to be told I'm not fat; I need to do this for myself. Thank you guys for bearing with me, once again, and in the coming months... let's pray for results.
Thank you all for your continued support. You've all done so much for me and it's about time I did something with it. :)
This entire past week I've had mood swings out the wazoo. Anyone who follows me on Twitter can attest, I've been complaining a whole lot- more than usual, as a matter of fact. But typically my sour moods only last a night and then are gone for a while. This hung around for a lot longer, and last night the reasons why kind of came together.
Lately I've been mulling around a new character idea. Not a replacement for Duino, but someone who'd be like Rainer and just kind of be around for abuse pictures and silliness. Though I was really hesitant to get art, for three big reasons: A) I don't show Rainer enough love as it is and he doesn't need to have even more competition B) The things I wanted to use the new guy for are what Rainer was invented for in the first place and C) This guy was shaping up to be what I wanted in a friend rather than a character of my own, and it felt weird to have something so distant from myself as an OC. Like I was inventing a fictional boyfriend for Duino and MAN I don't want to be that guy.
The reason this dude came up in my thought process to start was because of how much I've rebounded into the mode of "I want to be a cartoon." It's a desire I never stop having, but it's been especially strong lately. And with that mood I've been daydreaming about physical comedy and gags and performing, and eventually came to the grim acceptance that I'm in the worst shape of my life. The reason I've been so depressed lately, and felt so lonely and pathetic, is because I'm in no condition to pursue slapstick, the thing I want to learn more than anything. I want to get good at comic movement and maybe even dancing, and living the way I am now is taking me further away.
I don't know if I've ever told anyone the story of the last time I ever felt truly motivated by something, but it was back in high school when I first joined the fandom. I was seeing pictures of suits all over and was captivated with them. So the next three months of my life and I drove myself hard to exercise every night. And I actually saw some results. I wanted to participate so badly that I felt like doing something for myself, which I'd never really felt before and have rarely felt since.
It came full circle last night when I saw Dingoroo on the Pawpet show. Pawpet typically isn't my bag, but I was told Dingo was premiering his new suit and I wanted to check it out. And seeing him perform brought me back to the excitement I had years ago when I was just starting in the fandom. The energy, the gestures, expressions, it was AMAZING. And what's more, the fact everyone was pointing and calling him a toon- that something I held as a dream was real. That's what I've always wanted. I'm a lot closer than I used to be, but this proved in my head I can actually do it for myself.
I woke up this morning realizing I'd felt so shitty because I'd been stopping myself from pursuing suiting, which has been one of the biggest things I'd like to try since I got into this crazy place. I keep saying I'll get a suit when I make some money and lose some weight, and I don't know what's made me think I can't do either at this point in my life. I've had health kicks and resolutions before, but this time I want it to be different. There's exercise equipment on campus and even a running track that's open at night I can use. I've already started doing stretches and sit-ups in my room and I'll add on more as I limber up. The reason I stopped last time was because I felt like I'd never be accepted by anyone in this community, and thanks to you incredibly patient people, that doubt's long gone. So without that in my way, I think I can do it.
I'll admit, I'm pretty nervous I'll give up again. But I also hope you guys will keep me going and will help remind me to exercise every night. Dieting is historically much harder for me, and while I'm eating less now, I'll tackle a true diet plan once I've made headway with exercising regularly. It's cheesy as hell but there's nothing I want more in life than to be a cartoon, and I owe it to myself to slim down. I've been overweight all my life, and I don't need to be told I'm not fat; I need to do this for myself. Thank you guys for bearing with me, once again, and in the coming months... let's pray for results.
Thank you all for your continued support. You've all done so much for me and it's about time I did something with it. :)
Fursuiting is not for everyone, remember.
I personally dont think you need another character right now. You have so much you can do with Rainer and Duino right now. But that's just my opinion. I am always thinking about new characters myself, but I am pretty happy with what I have now. I think I have had pretty good results expanding my existing character's abilities with the Microwave video, and also with "The Detention Club" , which you will be seeing later this month.
As far as weight loss / exercize, I have found it is the little things that add up.
Park far away ON PURPOSE. Take your empty shopping cart back to the store. Take the stairs instead of the elevator.
Maybe volunteer to pick up trash at a park or something? Cut an elderly person's grass or shovel their walk? There's exercize you can feel good about.
I still eat the things i like, but less.
2 slices of pizza instead of 3
6 hot wings instead of 8
1 slice of cheese instead of 2 on my sandwich.
Oh and ALWAYS WATER INSTEAD OF SODA. Plus , WATER IS FREEEEE!
Oh and when I was your age, I too, wanted to be a cartoon character. So, I made it happen. I moved to FLA and got a job as Woody Woodpecker.
23 years later and I am still a cartoon character. :) There's your motivation.
Rest assured, I'll bug you about it now and again, and I'm behind you 100% of the way. You can do it.
*hug*
Also you feel motivation that you felt like back when you first joined FA. Take advantage of this motivation since you have the tools for it. You have been stretching and doing sit-ups which is a good start. However there is that gym over there. Use that motivation you have to get to that gym like how you were when you started in the fandom. You stopped because you didn’t feel like you would be accepted by anyone. Look at you now! Nearly 20,000 page views and you have 637 watches. You have a lot of followers and I’ve seen you on twitter talking about how much your friends mean to you.
I am in the same boat as you with the weight. It turns out that the freshman fifteen is not a myth…I’ve found out for myself. Haha! That’s good that you have been eating less but if you keep that up and then add exercising to your routine regularly you will start to lose. Got to get more energy to be more animated! Haha!
Anyways, that’s my two cents. Hope things get better for you Duino!
Every time one of my diets has been successful, it's been because of that app. Give it a shot. I'm sure I'll be going back to it as soon as BLFC is over.
omg you go, man
this is awesome
if you need any campy 80s workout vids just tell me because i know where to find that shit (youtube. you can literally find it all on youtube. i'm not even gonna frickin pretend)
I'm sure you would be just fine too!
And next con we meet up at- Im shoving you in a suit. They're hella fun, s'why I build em. hehe