I've always been a good person and try my very best to just be me and make people happy. It feels recently though that I'm an outcast in a group of outcasts though. I'm not sure what exactly is causing this, but I don't have many friends in the fandom and my attempts seem to be met with exclusion because I'm not in a clique. I want to be involved, I want to learn and grow. But mostly, I want friends... People to talk to, people who genuinely care about me.

I don't think it's fair that someone who's trying to be responsible and can't afford to do many extra things or buy porn should be looked past when it comes to being involved. I'm not saying these are the reasons I feel this way, I just feel they could be contributing.

Things I feel keep me from being social:
-I have a mate, so people who are looking for a serious relationship won't find one and don't bother with friendship even.
-I can't attend many meets because of scheduling and funding, but hopefully that will change soon.
-I don't have very much art of my character because I can't draw and can't afford getting many things drawn.
-I have body hair. Seriously, why is it that people who want to be covered in fur are obsessed with removing the closest natural thing they have to it?

So yeah, for these reasons I think people skip over me. The last one is silly, but it has its justifications too for me feeling that way.

At any rate, I'm really looking forward to this convention next week and I'm hoping I'll get to make lots of new friends and experience new things. I just want to be accepted and not feel so alone in this big world.