We here at bird radio have the fastest, the most accurate and the best news from the front lines, up close and personal! Owlet forces are making lighting progress on all fronts, the enemy axis of laziness, inactivity and bad habits are crumbling under our unrelenting advance. Armed with the power of motivation, inspiration and routine, no story could hope to escape our crinkly owlet's skill and determination. At a rate of no less than 3,000 words per day we work towards the total annihilation of the enemy nation of Queue.

In other news, our boys down in research and development have got a secret operation, known only as the Chitzkov Project, which is sure to reinvent how the world knows and loves our hatchling avian nation! Furthermore, we the nation have entered into the long and winding road to a powerful, chiseled new body, complete with such necessities as abs! Bulging pecs! Epic arms! And a padded posterior that makes all the nice ladies swoon.

This concludes this episode of Keeping Up With A Bird: Story of a fledgling nation. Please stay tuned for a note from our sponsors... Are you having accidents in bed? Well, then you should try- *Click*