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Family is Family I guess....
11 years ago
So, just right off the hop, I try not to post shit like this but I could use some advice on how to deal with it. If not at least dealing with the stress.
A few years back my parents bought a house, started getting their life back on track, and got their acts together about paying their bills and shit (before is another long story.... not getting into it). Things were good until two years ago when her business partner decided he would drink away the profits and accuse mom of stealing them, and let his drunken girlfriend (at the time) run the chip truck out front of the store. (for the record the store they owned was like a pawn shop, sorry for jumping thoughts) The guy had been a co-signer for my mom when she bought the house, and he decided that he didn't want mom to have the house, and pulled out of the agreement forcing mom to almost lose the house. With a little luck, mom was able to find someone to give her a second mortgage, and that's where my current problem comes in. Over the past two years it appears she and dad have slipped back into old habbits and have been dodging bills and letting services get cut and every time I turn around they have had a new provider for just about everything. Three months ago, she received a notice saying she would be evicted from the premises as the bank was going to foreclose on the house. During that time I was (and still am) training to be a financial advisor and offered to book a meeting with one of my senior staff to help her fix the mess she was in. "I don't have time" was her automatic response. I also sent her a list of various other places to go and she didn't even try them. It felt like I was watching them drown, throwing them floatation devices only for them to take a look at it and say "wrong colour" before tossing it away and resume yelling for help..... (stole that example from my boss). That being said she lucked out and she got to keep the house for two more months but as of last week she was forced to leave. I offered again with many different solutions but to the same result as last time. She's got it stuck in her head that she can save the house, but won't listen to any other help offered. As of the moment I'm not talking to her, especially since some of her bill collectors are coming after me to get her to come in as she used me as a reference.
Anyways sorry, just needed to get that out of my system. Thanks for listening.
A few years back my parents bought a house, started getting their life back on track, and got their acts together about paying their bills and shit (before is another long story.... not getting into it). Things were good until two years ago when her business partner decided he would drink away the profits and accuse mom of stealing them, and let his drunken girlfriend (at the time) run the chip truck out front of the store. (for the record the store they owned was like a pawn shop, sorry for jumping thoughts) The guy had been a co-signer for my mom when she bought the house, and he decided that he didn't want mom to have the house, and pulled out of the agreement forcing mom to almost lose the house. With a little luck, mom was able to find someone to give her a second mortgage, and that's where my current problem comes in. Over the past two years it appears she and dad have slipped back into old habbits and have been dodging bills and letting services get cut and every time I turn around they have had a new provider for just about everything. Three months ago, she received a notice saying she would be evicted from the premises as the bank was going to foreclose on the house. During that time I was (and still am) training to be a financial advisor and offered to book a meeting with one of my senior staff to help her fix the mess she was in. "I don't have time" was her automatic response. I also sent her a list of various other places to go and she didn't even try them. It felt like I was watching them drown, throwing them floatation devices only for them to take a look at it and say "wrong colour" before tossing it away and resume yelling for help..... (stole that example from my boss). That being said she lucked out and she got to keep the house for two more months but as of last week she was forced to leave. I offered again with many different solutions but to the same result as last time. She's got it stuck in her head that she can save the house, but won't listen to any other help offered. As of the moment I'm not talking to her, especially since some of her bill collectors are coming after me to get her to come in as she used me as a reference.
Anyways sorry, just needed to get that out of my system. Thanks for listening.
I hope things get better. But it's true, you can't help someone who won't help themselves. At some point she probably will do what she has to. You've done all you could, it sounds like.