Abit late... Only 1 hour of the day left!

Been a crazy horrible day.. I feel like it will never end.

Started ok but after breakfast during the nurse visit i had a panic attack while getting canulated. I do not like this new drug, i dont like how it makes me feel atall, frightening. Daughter gave me a bollocking, that i need to take it and what have you, so i did. Spent pretty much the whole day like a zombie, on off sleep, drowsy and nausious. I cant handle it so i've refused to take any more and i've been given iv morphine instead, i'm on 6 hourly, nurse will be back. I've been asked again if i want to be admitted and refused. I'll just end up in a fucking hospice doo lally on pain meds. no chance, staying in my house.

been drawing, just a doodle for a trade on the fa forums, was nice to finally draw as i've not for a while. No inspiration or drive. Going to try make it digital but i'm not sure how i'll manage. Best foot forward though. (How very mary poppins). I've got a home visit tomorrow morning with a lady from Macmillan, kind of therapy i think, not sure how it will go or what to expect.. I'm hoping she likes cake... I've got so much cake from friends and family its getting out of hand!