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Personal Journal - Day 16: Anchoring Rituals
10 years ago
Rituals are something I went over yesterday (Or…for anyone following along, today…yeah, I forgot to edit and post yesterday’s journal…oops). Today, we’re looking at creating those anchors. This is a little easier if you have a friend around to help you out with this and while yes, it can be stupid, it HAS to be consistent! You can also do this yourself.
A lot of people try to make changes, but they don’t stick. They try to “reprogram” their responses or “rituals” but again, they don’t stick. Why not? Well, the reason is that they do the changes consciously. In other words, the changes they are trying to make are not a conditioned response, meaning that the environment around them does not trigger that response, so they have to consciously make a change and…by that point, the emotional state has already peaked.
Anchoring Rituals: Reacting to your environment
So I’m going to start breaking these down into topics (Easier for me to look back on too).
1: You’re always anchoring.
2: Taking advantage of anchors already around you
3: Collapsing anchors
4: “Swish” patterns.
1: You’re always anchoring.
One thing we should all remember, is that no matter what happens, we are always anchoring. There is never a point in time where anchors are not created or maintained. So how are these so called “Anchors” created?
Anchors are a result of a unique action that occurs around you when you are in any emotional state, whether that is a state of anger, happiness, depression, excitement, or otherwise. If you are experiencing an emotion strong enough, anything that happens around you consistently while you’re in that state gets associated to the emotional state in your nervous system.
Anchors can occur even when we don’t want them to if we’re not careful. As an example (I may have used this earlier for the neurological associations but…whatever, it deals with anchors as well): Lets say there’s a couple. Mates (Let’s say a wolf and dingo). Now, the wolf has a hard day at work and is feeling very lousy. They come home and their mate is there and they come over to try and cheer them up but the wolf just won’t have it. They stay angry or frustrated or sad, whatever that emotion may be, while the dingo tries to comfort them. All the while, this wolf is going to be seeing this dingo while they’re in this particularly strong emotional state. Say this happens again the next day, and once again on the third day. Now, what happens if they have a GREAT day at work on the fourth day? This wolf gets off work and can’t wait to get home to see their mate! But…guess what? They walk in and when they see their mate, they immediately get a state change and suddenly they feel lousy again. Has anything like that ever happened to you before? Maybe you were on the receiving end of this?
Here’s why that happened: Even though these two are mates and they love each other very much, the wolf associated their mate, the dingo, with the negative emotions they were feeling when they came home from work. This scenario could’ve been avoided if the dingo had simply interrupted their mates pattern in some way.
Creating an anchor
In order to create an anchor, you need to put yourself in the emotional state you want to anchor to and make sure that you are experiencing this emotion very strongly.
Use a “trigger” to anchor that emotional state to that particular action, scent, or even picture. It HAS to be unique or it won’t work. Have you ever seen a reprint of a painting that was displayed at the funeral of a loved one? If you focused on that while at the funeral, chances are you’ll get a hint of those same feelings you felt while there. What about apple pie? Remind you of thanksgiving maybe?
While you’re experiencing this emotion, condition yourself with this anchor consistently. Keep repeating the same action, glancing at the same picture, sniffing at the same scent, or whatever it is that you’ve picked, maybe even listening to the same song, until it becomes a conditioned response. Just like Ivan Pavlov and his dogs. The dogs are in a state of hunger, he rings a bell. This continues for a while until it gets to the point where he rings a bell (At any point in time) and the dogs immediately feel hungry.
2: Take Advantage of anchors already around you.
How? Well, how’s about music? Maybe comedy shows? What about in business? Anchors are ALL OVER. Conferences, for example. Meetings and the like. If you’ve ever been brought in for an interview before, you’ve probably sat with a desk between yourself and the hiring manager. The spot behind that desk is a position of power, so to speak.
In everyday life, if you want to feel a certain way, you’ll have to learn how to utilize your environment. Figure out what environment makes you feel the best, and work from there. I personally like the outdoors. I like the smells, sounds, and generally the sights. It’s calming. I love the mountains and oceans, but we don’t have that here. My favorite spot back in hawai’i was the beach, but obviously I’m nowhere near an ocean so I can’t really go back there whenever I want to, right? Well, not entirely true… Ambient noise is something that is readily available as an app. I’ve got it and I will generally play this sound at night and it helps me get back to that place. Occasionally so much so that I can feel a light breeze and the sand I’d lay on. Hell, it has even gotten to the point where I truly thought I was there.
3: Collapsing anchors:
In order to collapse an anchor you need to do a couple things.
1: Think of an experience that will put yourself into an intense, emotional state opposite that of the anchor that you want to get rid of. I would suggest anchoring that emotional state to a physical trigger. Get another experience where you were experience that same sort of emotional state and anchor that to the same trigger. This is known as stacking an anchor. Make sure to test this. If you’re not feeling these emotions flow when triggering this anchor, then you need to go back and really get back into that state. You can’t just do something halfway, remember that.
2: After you’ve successfully anchored yourself, fire off BOTH anchors at the same time. What exactly happens here? When those two responses “collide” in your brain, the emotion which is more intense will basically collapse the other. This is why you stack anchors to a single trigger, otherwise you might end up with multiple anchors for the emotion you were trying to get rid of.
Anchors last longer the stronger the emotional tie.
4: The Swish pattern
What is this? Well, it’s a pattern that will basically exchange one anchor for another. This is done through visualization.
1: Take an image, say one of procrastination and make that as clear as possible. Imagine what you look like when you are beginning to procrastinate. Imagine what you see, what you feel.
2: Once that’s clear or as clear as you can get it, put it aside and visualize your “ideal” self so to speak. Get that as clear as possible as well. What do you look like? How do you hold yourself? How do you feel?
3: Take that image and put that aside and bring back the one of procrastination. Then visualize the ideal image and “shatter” or “break-through” that old image we don’t want to have anymore. Repeat this at a faster pace, lingering on your ideal image and eventually (if done often and fast enough) It’ll be something that would happen on a more subconscious level, where you don’t even have to pay attention to it
Exercise: Pick an emotion you want to have and anchor it in. Get yourself back into a point in time where you felt that emotion strongly and anchor yourself.
A lot of people try to make changes, but they don’t stick. They try to “reprogram” their responses or “rituals” but again, they don’t stick. Why not? Well, the reason is that they do the changes consciously. In other words, the changes they are trying to make are not a conditioned response, meaning that the environment around them does not trigger that response, so they have to consciously make a change and…by that point, the emotional state has already peaked.
Anchoring Rituals: Reacting to your environment
So I’m going to start breaking these down into topics (Easier for me to look back on too).
1: You’re always anchoring.
2: Taking advantage of anchors already around you
3: Collapsing anchors
4: “Swish” patterns.
1: You’re always anchoring.
One thing we should all remember, is that no matter what happens, we are always anchoring. There is never a point in time where anchors are not created or maintained. So how are these so called “Anchors” created?
Anchors are a result of a unique action that occurs around you when you are in any emotional state, whether that is a state of anger, happiness, depression, excitement, or otherwise. If you are experiencing an emotion strong enough, anything that happens around you consistently while you’re in that state gets associated to the emotional state in your nervous system.
Anchors can occur even when we don’t want them to if we’re not careful. As an example (I may have used this earlier for the neurological associations but…whatever, it deals with anchors as well): Lets say there’s a couple. Mates (Let’s say a wolf and dingo). Now, the wolf has a hard day at work and is feeling very lousy. They come home and their mate is there and they come over to try and cheer them up but the wolf just won’t have it. They stay angry or frustrated or sad, whatever that emotion may be, while the dingo tries to comfort them. All the while, this wolf is going to be seeing this dingo while they’re in this particularly strong emotional state. Say this happens again the next day, and once again on the third day. Now, what happens if they have a GREAT day at work on the fourth day? This wolf gets off work and can’t wait to get home to see their mate! But…guess what? They walk in and when they see their mate, they immediately get a state change and suddenly they feel lousy again. Has anything like that ever happened to you before? Maybe you were on the receiving end of this?
Here’s why that happened: Even though these two are mates and they love each other very much, the wolf associated their mate, the dingo, with the negative emotions they were feeling when they came home from work. This scenario could’ve been avoided if the dingo had simply interrupted their mates pattern in some way.
Creating an anchor
In order to create an anchor, you need to put yourself in the emotional state you want to anchor to and make sure that you are experiencing this emotion very strongly.
Use a “trigger” to anchor that emotional state to that particular action, scent, or even picture. It HAS to be unique or it won’t work. Have you ever seen a reprint of a painting that was displayed at the funeral of a loved one? If you focused on that while at the funeral, chances are you’ll get a hint of those same feelings you felt while there. What about apple pie? Remind you of thanksgiving maybe?
While you’re experiencing this emotion, condition yourself with this anchor consistently. Keep repeating the same action, glancing at the same picture, sniffing at the same scent, or whatever it is that you’ve picked, maybe even listening to the same song, until it becomes a conditioned response. Just like Ivan Pavlov and his dogs. The dogs are in a state of hunger, he rings a bell. This continues for a while until it gets to the point where he rings a bell (At any point in time) and the dogs immediately feel hungry.
2: Take Advantage of anchors already around you.
How? Well, how’s about music? Maybe comedy shows? What about in business? Anchors are ALL OVER. Conferences, for example. Meetings and the like. If you’ve ever been brought in for an interview before, you’ve probably sat with a desk between yourself and the hiring manager. The spot behind that desk is a position of power, so to speak.
In everyday life, if you want to feel a certain way, you’ll have to learn how to utilize your environment. Figure out what environment makes you feel the best, and work from there. I personally like the outdoors. I like the smells, sounds, and generally the sights. It’s calming. I love the mountains and oceans, but we don’t have that here. My favorite spot back in hawai’i was the beach, but obviously I’m nowhere near an ocean so I can’t really go back there whenever I want to, right? Well, not entirely true… Ambient noise is something that is readily available as an app. I’ve got it and I will generally play this sound at night and it helps me get back to that place. Occasionally so much so that I can feel a light breeze and the sand I’d lay on. Hell, it has even gotten to the point where I truly thought I was there.
3: Collapsing anchors:
In order to collapse an anchor you need to do a couple things.
1: Think of an experience that will put yourself into an intense, emotional state opposite that of the anchor that you want to get rid of. I would suggest anchoring that emotional state to a physical trigger. Get another experience where you were experience that same sort of emotional state and anchor that to the same trigger. This is known as stacking an anchor. Make sure to test this. If you’re not feeling these emotions flow when triggering this anchor, then you need to go back and really get back into that state. You can’t just do something halfway, remember that.
2: After you’ve successfully anchored yourself, fire off BOTH anchors at the same time. What exactly happens here? When those two responses “collide” in your brain, the emotion which is more intense will basically collapse the other. This is why you stack anchors to a single trigger, otherwise you might end up with multiple anchors for the emotion you were trying to get rid of.
Anchors last longer the stronger the emotional tie.
4: The Swish pattern
What is this? Well, it’s a pattern that will basically exchange one anchor for another. This is done through visualization.
1: Take an image, say one of procrastination and make that as clear as possible. Imagine what you look like when you are beginning to procrastinate. Imagine what you see, what you feel.
2: Once that’s clear or as clear as you can get it, put it aside and visualize your “ideal” self so to speak. Get that as clear as possible as well. What do you look like? How do you hold yourself? How do you feel?
3: Take that image and put that aside and bring back the one of procrastination. Then visualize the ideal image and “shatter” or “break-through” that old image we don’t want to have anymore. Repeat this at a faster pace, lingering on your ideal image and eventually (if done often and fast enough) It’ll be something that would happen on a more subconscious level, where you don’t even have to pay attention to it
Exercise: Pick an emotion you want to have and anchor it in. Get yourself back into a point in time where you felt that emotion strongly and anchor yourself.
