It took just a few days for my life to go down in pieces again. I thought I was finally on my way to get better. I had a wonderful boyfriend, I talked to my bestfriend all the time, I had stopped hurting myself and I had finally gotten medicine against my issues. But ofcourse nothing can ever go my way can it?

First my boyfriend stopped talking to me after confessing that he was being bullied in school. Then my bestfriend started to ignore me telling me "oh well talk tomorrow mate".
Now when I finally managed to get ahold of my boyfriend again he tells me he is questioning his sexual orientation and he doesn't know how he feels about me.

And just like that I'm back to square one. Abusing alcohol,hurting myself and telling myself I ain't worth shit. I just wanna scream and shout but no one hears me. No one listens to me when I talk and I don't even think my friends know I exsist anymore. My paranoia and anxiety has started to return once again. My medication does nothing.

I don't know how much longer I can stand this? I don't know what to do?
Am I going insane? It sure feels like it.